Are you friends with your ex? Probably not, but maybe - I don’t make the rules. Do you ever go for dinner with them? I’d hazard no, absolutely not, but again, nobody died and made me king of post-relationship inter-personal affairs. But I think, as a team (and we are a team, I love you) we can all agree that going out for dinner with an ex is probably not conducive to a ‘wicked night out which I can’t wait to do’.
Still, would you do it if it meant that you could eat and drink for free at a Mexican restaurant? If you could go into famed chain Wahaca and have a full meal and a load of drinks for absolutely nowt, but you had to eat and drink them sat opposite your terrifying ex-partner? Are you that desperate for a free meal? To sit beside the person that punched your heart out through your back? To gaze into the eyes of the djinn that swallowed your soul? To sip a margarita in front of a human black hole that sucks the life from everything in its immediate vicinity? To eat a taco in fro- OH GOD I STILL LOVE YOU COME BACK TO ME I DIDN’T MEAN TO.
Well, if you fancy that, then all you gotta do is head on over to Wahaca’s website and fill out a form detailing a few important details, like what you miss most about them and what you’re hoping to achieve from the night, and you might be in with a slap-up meal, free of all charges.
The idea behind the stunt came from a Wahaca HR man drunk texting a bunch of exes, and that transgression has resulted in him being transformed into the sole judge of your application forms and therefore decider of your fate. You have to impress John from HR, basically. Good luck.
And good luck on the night, you absolute weirdo. What are you doing? Get a takeaway, a Cherry B and sink them both alone on your sofa - it’s cheap and will result in a much better night than two hours wolfing down a bunch of spicy food in front of the physical manifestation of the demon Chernabog.
“I’m not crying at you, it’s the chillies hahahaha please take me back.”