Kim Jong-un has launched a contest to find his sister a husband

Posted by
Nick Pope

Meeting a new girlfriend’s family is daunting at the best of times, let alone if she’s related to one of the most egomaniacal war criminals on planet Earth.

And it’s for that reason that we’re steering clear of Kim Jong-un’s search to find a match for his unmarried sister, Kim Yo-jong.

Nothing against you, Kim Yo-jong. We’re sure you’re a perfectly nice Vice Director of Propaganda and Agitation. It’s just, the inevitable break-up would be hard enough without the life-time of slave labour that would follow. 

Anyway: The Sun has revealed that the North Korean leader has launched the competition to find a husband for his sister, who was recently elected as a member of the powerful Central Committee. He put out a similar call-to-action in 2012, but no one managed to live up to the breezy-eared dictator’s high expectations.

Apparently the candidates must be graduates from, or students of, Pyongyang’s Kim Il-sung University, have served in the army, and measure up to at least 5 ft 10 (the same height as Kim Jung-un – as long as he has his disco heels on, of course).

But we think the contest is a big waste of time, because her soul mate has been right in front of her face all along. According to 9News, Yo-jang played a huge part in bringing US basketball eccentric Dennis Rodman over to North Korea a few years back. A mere friendship – or something more?

We hope so, because that’s a wedding we’d move to North Korea for.