ShortList is supported by you, our amazing readers. When you click through the links on our site and make a purchase we may earn a commission. Learn more

Back of the net! An Alan Partridge disco is coming to London

Nipple-less Pringle jumpers optional

Back of the net! An Alan Partridge disco is coming to London
31 January 2018

Mr Alan Partridge, disc jockey and chat show host supreme, is nothing if not a music lover.

His radio shows and televisual programs are awash with prime cuts of musical excellence and, while a lot of it is firmly rooted in the middle of the road, he’s not averse to really venturing to the real extremes of music, such as his love of the acapella choral banger ‘Gaudete’ and the timeless grace of ‘Theme from Black Beauty’.

So it’s absolutely no surprise that an evening at a discotheque is being planned in Alan’s honour, although it is a surprise that it is taking place in London, the home of disappointment and not being appreciated, and not in the cultural hotbed of Norwich.

Yes, Massive Arms’ annual Alan Disco is back for another night, and it’s taking place on Friday 9 February, Upstairs at the Ritzy in Brixton.

They urge you to: “Munch on a Toblerone in your bare feet, get sloshed on lady boys and dance to Go West and OMD” and if that doesn’t sound like a great night then you can eff off.

The DJs (presumbly not including Dave Clifton) will be spinning the following: Abba//The Best of the Beatles//The Best of Bond //Bryan Adams//Chris Rea//Crowded House//Enya//ELO//Gary Numan//Go West//Hot Chocolate//Kate Bush//Kraftwerk//OMD//Wings//Phil Collins//The Police//REO Speedwagon//Queen//Shirley Bassey//Soft Cell//T’Pau//Thin Lizzy//UB40 … and many more soft rock classics.

And, with the event taking place near Valentine’s Day, there’s even an hour of karaoke, with revellers urged to “bring your 15-inch plate, buy a rose and sing along to Hot Chocolate and The Carpenters directly into the face of your love.” (Yes, we know it’s actually a 12-inch plate, take it up with them, not us.)

They also promise that, “we’re working on Chas ‘N’ Dave arm wrestling and DEFINITELY some lap dancing”.

Naturally, there have already been concerns raised by worried punters:

Yes, yes, we know what you’re thinking. And they’ve already thought of it.

There’s some great banter on the Facebook event wall already:

Here’s a poster:

And here is a thoroughly excellent Partridge mixtape, entitled ‘Classic Intercourse’, to get you in the mood.

You can get your tickets right here.

And let’s all have a little play on our air basses shall we?

(Image: BBC)