There are a few things we already know about UKIP voters.
One: They think Nigel Farage is a reasonable person to assume a position of genuine authority. They have looked at Nigel Farage and thought “yes: this man, who has failed to become an MP not once or twice but SEVEN TIMES, is a person I would entrust with issues of national importance”.
Two: Loads of them are racist.
Three: They are all, even if they are not literally divorced dads, divorced dads.
Anyway, new polling has turned up a brand new fact about UKIP voters: UKIP voters mostly think it is totally fine to literally fuck a dog.
According to this poll from YouGov, that is.
The poll was a response to a recent news story in which a pensioner was convinced of having sex with a series of dogs, including a St Bernard called Oscar. Most people – people who don’t vote UKIP – do not like the fact that an old woman had sex with a St Bernard called Oscar. Most people would put themselves in the “old women should probably not have sex with St Bernards either called Oscar or any other name” camp.
12% of UKIP voters though – they have no such qualms. Immigration? Bad. The metric system? Bad. Non-British people in British football teams? Extremely bad, guys! Fucking dogs? Fine. Totally fine to fuck a dog, lads. Just go right ahead and fuck that dog.
And people online – though it’s unconfirmed whether or not they voted UKIP – have also taken up arms in...public defence of having sex with dogs?
Anyway: don’t fuck dogs, bye.
