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Schoolboy Crushes

Last seen blu-tacked to your bedroom wall

Schoolboy Crushes

Appropriate or not, we spent many teenage days daydreaming of a girl who was way out of our reach.

Whether she was too old, too hot or too damn famous, our crushes were hopeless but still we couldn't let go. With time we've grown accustomed to bringing a tad more rationality to our one-sided celebrity love affairs but back in the day, it was tough to come to terms with.

Here's to the crushes that made double geography just a little bit more bearable.

Kimberley Davies

As the gold-digging wife of poor Lou Carpenter, we didn't care that Annalise was conniving, manipulative or scheming as she was also really hot and gave us another reason to look forward to the end of the school day. Conveniently clothed in a variety of revealing outfits, she was a 'free-spirited' antidote to the more wholesome female characters who lived on Ramsay Street.

Melissa Joan Hart

While your sister watched and nodded her way through an episode of Clarissa Explains It All, you always tended to make an excuse to sit in and watch it as well. It obviously wasn't for Clarissa's sage advice. As Sabrina the Teenage Witch took over, your crush on Melissa Joan Hart increased, despite her potentially lethal interest in witchcraft. Wholesome but slightly mischievous, Hart's risqué side finally emerged with some scantily clad photo shoots all grown up.

Gillian Anderson

Despite playing a character who was almost annoyingly sceptical (show her an actual living, breathing alien and she'd say it was an optical illusion), Gillian Anderson was still an important figure for many boys growing up. Beneath the party pooping, Scully was lightly flirtatious and off-screen she wasn't afraid of the odd sexy shoot.

Check out our gallery of redheads here.

Alicia Silverstone

In the 1995 comedy Clueless, Alicia Silverstone played the much hotter equivalent of the girl at school that wouldn't be seen dead talking to you. Forgetting the fact that also played Batgirl in the film we shall not speak of, Silverstone was one of the most desirable girls of the 90s. Possessing enough of an attitude to hint at a bad side yet turning on the smile to show you she wasn't completely high maintenance, she was dream girlfriend material.

Tiffani Amber Thiessen

As kids, 90% of us probably assumed that high school would be virtually identical to an episode of Saved by the Bell. Luckily at that naïve time we were blissfully unaware that there would be actual work to be done, the headmaster would be far less amusing and there would definitely be no girls that resembled Kelly Kapowski. The subject of many boyhood crushes, she may have given us an unreasonable expectation of 16-year-old girls but unlike most of her contemporaries she was actually playing her own age. Take that Dawson's Creek.

Kim Basinger

Whether you'd watched Batman legitimately or 9 1/2 Weeks when you really weren't supposed to, chances are you probably had a major, helpless, "what are these feelings?" crush on Kim Basinger. The softly spoken model-turned-actress may also have starred in your stolen copy of Playboy magazine back in the day.

Jessica Rabbit

The anatomically impossible yet incredibly sexy Jessica Rabbit made for a confusing object of affection growing up. Yes she was beautiful but yes she was also a cartoon. Giving us a somewhat unattainable idea of what women should look like, she still remains the sexiest animated character ever (sorry Betty Rubble).

Check out our list of animated guys who managed to land women way out of their league here.


A staple of our Saturday night viewing (along with Noel's House Party and, depressingly, Casualty), Gladiators provided both sexes with a range of scantily clad athletes to cheer on and check out. However, with some of the women veering on the little too muscular side, it was slim pickings for us. Luckily Jet was here to save the day. The one-time Games Mistress from Games World, she made us very happy whenever we heard Snap's The Power.

Yasmine Bleeth

Probably the only family show ever to be populated by characters who gleefully flaunted their flesh while wearing tight-fitting swimming costumes, Baywatch gave us many reasons to be grateful. Pamela Anderson may have dominated most of the attention but it was Yasmine Bleeth that truly deserved it. Admittedly, we can't remember a whole lot about her character Caroline but we can remember that she was damn good at running in slow motion.

Your Friend's Mum

Don't tell your friend obviously, as even now it would probably still sting, but throughout a large portion of your teenage years, you had a bit of a thing for his mum. You'd make an excuse to talk to her for just a bit longer while your friend fumed in the background and you assumed that her casual questions and hospitality was actually her way of flirting. Looking back, you were clearly, embarrassingly wrong.