Chris Hemsworth, a man who has defied science by having arms more handsome than most actors’ faces, says the next Avengers film will be even more shocking and distressing than the end of Avengers: Infinity War.
Chris, dude, how? That film ended with half the universe disappearing, beloved figures we’ve spent a decade with dissolving into thin air, as Thanos’ dastardly plan came to fruition. Tears in the cinema, popcorn being thrown at the screen in heartbroken disbelief, Platoon-style cries of “Noooooooo!” as poor little Spider-Man went wibbly wobbly and Black Panther became Non-Existent Panther.
But that’s what Hemsworth claims in an interview with Esquire where he’s meant to be talking about watches:
”If you were shocked by [Infinity War], I think the second one is even more shocking, for other reasons entirely. That’s what kind of blew me away the first time I read both scripts, is how they managed to orchestrate so many different characters but give them each their own separate shot and moments, and have it be elevated and feel fresh and unique—not just like a messy, thrown-together assembly of these guys.”
The as-yet-untitled followup has him giddy with excitement, which is a shame in a way as it isn’t coming out until next May.
“The second one I’m probably even more excited about. Just for people to see. I just think it’s another step again. Each step we seem to take with these films, I’ve loved the fact that there’s been growth and evolution and it continues to surprise people as opposed to sort of flatlining, which was obviously always a fear—that they’d run out of ideas or run dry of creative excitement. For me, this whole experience has been incredible. In particular the last one.”
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If you want to remember this information in a snappy, rhyming format, here’s a poem you can learn and recite:
The guy who plays Thor
Says Avengers part four
Will be bleak like the last one –
In fact, even more.
There isn’t a proper title for the film, despite it being less than a year away. But why? The most obvious answer is that it probably includes spoilers for Infinity War, so they’ll wait until that’s out on Blu-Ray at least, so as not to ruin it for people who didn’t/couldn’t/wouldn’t seen it in the cinema.
Possible titles could include:
- Avengers: Bloody Hell, Everyone’s Dead
- Avengers: Now With No Tom Hiddleston!
- Avengers: Obviously Black Panther Comes Back
- Avengers Four: More Sore Thor, But No More O’ Gamora
- Avengers Four: Returning The Universe To How It Was After Avengers Two
- Avengers: There’s A Spider-Man Sequel Coming Out Soon So He’ll Be Fine, Or Else That Film Would Be A Deeply Strange Viewing Experience – This Also Applies To Guardians Of The Galaxy
The untitled Avengers 4 is out on May 3rd, 2019.
(Pics: Marvel Studios)