With The Running Man hitting cinemas on November 12, we thought now would be a great time to consider some of the other Arnold Schwarzenegger movies that are ripe for the remake treatment.
What’s that? Edgar Wright’s new take is really more of a second adaptation of Stephen King’s source novel, and one that sticks far closer to the dark allegory of the original than the garish Arnie treatment.
Pshh, that’s the kind of nerdy detail The Governator would have no truck with. He’d probably walk up to it, ask for its clothes and its motorcycle, then punch it.
Looking back at The Austrian Oak’s oeuvre, it’s certainly true that they don’t make them like that anymore. Perhaps that’s a good thing, though.
Maybe someone should take these action classics from the ‘80s, ‘90s, and ’00s, and give them a light spritz (or a heavy coating) of modernity.
While it’s true that some of the Arnie film remakes to date (Total Recall, Conan the Barbarian) haven’t exactly been stellar, that feels more like a failure of execution than anything else – as the buzz surrounding Edgar Wright’s The Running Man goes to show.
8. Hercules in New York
![Hercules in New York (1970) OFFICIAL TRAILER [HD] - YouTube](https://img.youtube.com/vi/pvWySqI9uN4/maxresdefault.jpg)
We think of Arnie as an ‘80s and ‘90s action movie star, but the film that kicked off his cinematic career dates all the way back to 1970. In this so-bad-it’s-almost-good B-movie, a young and hilariously wooden Mr. Schwarzenegger plays the titular Greek/Roman demigod, sent to roam ‘modern day’ America by his disapproving father to much ensuring fish-out-of-water hilarity.
Some would argue that it sounds too much like the plot of Marvel’s first Thor movie to warrant a modern remake. But most people don’t really like or even remember that film, so why not?
7. The Terminator
This is borderline sacrilegious, I know, but having rewatched The Terminator recently, it... might not have aged as gracefully as some of the other legendary sci-fi movies out there.
Don’t get me wrong, it remains a career-defining action classic made on a shoestring budget, but a modern audience might not respond to it as positively as something like Alien.
Given the risible nature of the subsequent sequels (T2 apart), a modern remake would be hazardous ground to tread indeed. But the quality of the animated Netflix series Terminator Zero shows what a fresh perspective could do with this old IP.
6. Red Heat
Given the ongoing cool relations between the US and Russia, a modern remake of this late-Cold-War-era buddy cop thriller might not require too much reshaping. What would make more sense, from a geopolitical standpoint as well as plain old nomenclature, is if the remake paired up a grizzled US detective with a Chinese counterpart.
You have to suspect that it would do big numbers at the box office, especially if it were a true joint venture with official Chinese backing. That seems highly unlikely, of course, but stranger things have happened.
5. Kindergarten Cop
We may not have director Ivan Reitman’s light touch to lean on any more (RIP), but this oddly charming (if very of its time) 1990 action-comedy seems ripe for a modern remake.
The concept of a gruff detective going undercover as a kindergarten teacher, shooting bad guys and charming moms, sounds like the kind of stream-crossing magic that Netflix designed an algorithm to try and replicate.
We could see a well-executed modern version (we’re ignoring 2016’s woeful Kindergarten Cop 2) being the kind of film that whole families would sit down together for.
4. Last Action Hero
![Last Action Hero (1993) Theatrical Trailer [HD] - YouTube](https://img.youtube.com/vi/Kx0ApCyC_cg/maxresdefault.jpg)
Just two years on from his defining performance in Terminator 2, Schwarzenegger appeared in this under-appreciated gem. Co-written by Shane Black, it’s far smarter and more knowing than your average Arnie flick. The big man gamely sends up his macho persona and the whole action genre with his depiction of a stereotypical movie hero dragged into the real world.
He also plays the actor playing said character – a certain Arnold Schwarzenegger. It’s meta, alright, which is why we suspect that it would jive more with a modern audience, perhaps with Ryan Reynolds or Glen Powell taking the lead.
3. Twins
It’s an obvious joke, but one that’s surprisingly good enough to carry an entire movie – with a little Ivan Reitman magic to help it along, of course. Arnold Schwarzenegger and Danny DeVito play anything-but-identical twins who are separated at birth.
After taking very different paths through life, they’re reunited as adults, where they’re forced to contend with their obvious differences and surprising similarities. Half the fun here lies in speculating on who could play Julius (Arnie’s perfect specimen) and Vincent (DeVito’s schlubby criminal). Henry Cavill and Paul Walter Hauser, perhaps?
2. Commando
There was talk of a Commando remake back in 2014, but David Ayer’s treatment was reportedly scrapped. Which is probably a good thing. What made the 1985 original such a hoot wasn’t a gritty tone or a brutal examination of the men who take up arms for their country.
It was the insanely testosterone-filled thrill of Arnie’s John Matrix – what a name! – mowing down dozens of fools, throwing in the odd terrible pun before facing off against the campest villain in all of action cinema. Forget your grounded remake and double down on the histrionics.
1. True Lies
There’s already been a modern remake of this awesome 1994 film, but in the shape of a forgettable 2023 TV series. There’s clearly potential for a fresh take on the story of a secret agent struggling to maintain a ‘normal’ family life. Of course, finding a suitable replacement for Jamie Lee Curtis as the oblivious (though far from helpless) spouse would be tricky.
Maybe the solution would be to go all in and gender-swap the roles. At the very least, it would make half the internet explode into a frothing rage, which would be its own kind of fun.
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