Jump to Main ContentJump to Primary Navigation

10 cartoon characters who would never have held down their day jobs


Most cartoon characters have it pretty easy. They never age, they can survive infinite amounts of injuries and they never seem to worry about paying the bills. Which is strange because, for a lot of them, it seems pretty miraculous that they've managed to hold down any kind of job.

While we struggle away here in the boring real world, plenty of animated guys have been coasting in their chosen careers.

Here's our list of the 10 most blatant and let us know who else deserves to be here by commenting at the end.

(Images: YouTube)

Homer Simpson

Career: nuclear-factory operative

Despite only having a useful working life of three years, uranium rods take roughly 10,000 years to become safe enough to handle. Even when you take into consideration the fact that he has a crayon wedged in the front of his brain, Homer should not be taking them home with him.

Inspector Gadget

Career: private investigator

Rotorblades in his hat, spring-loaded arms, feet that become rockets, a two-way radio that works underwater and still he blunders his way through every crime scene until his young niece solves the mystery. Mind you, she can talk to her dog.

Elmer Fudd

Career: hunter

Always resplendent in new hunting garb and an alleged millionaire, Elmer struggled to pronounce his own first name, announced his arrival by proclaiming he was “hunting wabbits”, and invariably shot himself in the head.

Officer Charlie Dibble

Career: policeman

Dibble’s New York beat was one of the most crime-ridden patches in recent TV drama history. Worse, the main perpetrators – Fancy Fancy, Spook, Benny The Ball, The Brain, Choo Choo and Top Cat – were all cats. No arrests were ever made.

Deputy Dawg

Career: deputy sheriff

The ever-eager Dawg was frankly an embarrassment to his Mississippi law department. His skills appeared to consist of a) sitting in his office, and b) saying “dag nabit”. The Sheriff and Mrs Deputy’s patience with this buffoon has to be commended.

Ranger Smith

Career: park ranger

The ranger of a national park technically “assists with guided tours and promotes understanding and appreciation of the natural and cultural features of the park”. Ranger Smith, however, solely focused on making sure Yogi bear didn’t steal picnic baskets.

Mr Magoo

Career: actor

The decision makers that persuaded short-sighted retiree Mr Magoo to try his hand at acting again must have been high on paint fumes. On every film set he stumbled on to, the director immediately assumed Magoo was crazy until they later discovered it was simply his appallingly bad eyesight.


Career: sorcerer

Papa Smurf’s nemesis could have been one of the modern age’s great inventors – his ‘blue magnet’ for example, which solely attracted blue items, was remarkable. However, the grumpy chap largely focused on potion brewing, and every time he cooked something up, his entire lab exploded.

Crazylegs Crane

Career: midwife

The Pink Panther’s buddy, Crazylegs, was a stalk with one specific job: to deliver babies. Tragically, this fedora sporting bird appeared to be drunk more often than not and relied heavily on a small dragonfly to help him out whenever he got completely plastered.

Dick Dastardly

Career: racing-car driver

Mr Dastardly should have been the greatest racing driver to ever live. His car, the Mean Machine, had every gadget imaginable and his sidekick – a wheezing dog – could drive, although some of his mods, such as a super-sized vacuum, would be banned by Formula One bosses. And yet his driving career ended with ‘raced 74, won zero’, a score not helped by his mild fascination with catching a carrier pigeon.



Cartoon animals of questionable species


"Is she really going out with him?"

Homer Soprano.png

Cartoons meet reality