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13 brutally honest Valentine's Day cards your loved one needs

trump card.jpg

Despite feeling like we’ve only just got over one holiday of forced fun, Valentine’s Day is about to arrive armed with an anticipation of deep declarations of love and at least a good excuse for a fancy dinner.

But walk down a card aisle and the only feelings you’re sure to catch are ones of nausea. Garish red cards with gushy messages that you would never, ever say out of self-respect will have you thinking your partner will leave you if you get them one rather than cement your relationship status.

In the interest of not selling your soul, here are some alternative options that relay your realness and won’t leave either of you cringing:

For the couple who scroll together

phone

Get it here.

For someone who isn’t sick of Trump

trump card

Get it here.

For those who like to Netflix and chill

LAYLA

Get it here.

For the cynic

shits

Get it here

For someone with an imagination

savages

Get it here

For the anti-consumerist 

Roses

Get it here

For the right-swipers

tinder

Get it here

For The Walking Dead fan

zombie

Get it here

For the confessor

confession

Get it here

For someone who’s not the average Joe

coffee

Get it here

For the grumpy but soft

like

Get it here

For the punny

cheese

Get it here.

For those who CBA

text

Get it here

For the Game of Thrones fan who is not of many words

hodor

Get it here.

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