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There is an important campaign to change the name of fire ants to 'spicy boys'

Forget Brexit, this is the real issue

There is an important campaign to change the name of fire ants to 'spicy boys'
08 July 2016

In these times of Brexit, gun control arguments, global warming and the like, it's easy to overlook the big issues facing mankind right now.

One of those is the continual insistence by 'the suits' that we call fire ants 'fire ants'. Sure, it's a fairly badass name for an ant, but is it as good as 'spicy boys'? No, it is not.

Luckily, Pupperg Small, from Chernobyl (we're not sure we believe he is actually from Chernobyl), is determined to right this wrong and has set up a petition aimed for some reason at Michelle Obama, the First Lady.

“It's 2016, there are 36 genders, bayblade might be a new olympic sport, why aren't we calling fire ants 'spicy boys’?” the petition asks.

Currently, it stands at 30,000 signatures, with 35,000 the stated aim. Fire ants, as we all know, is actually the common name for several species which lie in the genus Solenopsis, which will probably be the title of the next Muse album. They are also known as plain old 'red ants' and even 'ginger ants'. Neither is as good as 'Spicy Boys'.

However, one potential issue is that they could get confused with this previous bunch of Spice Boys:

Needless to say, Twitter is overwhelmingly behind the campaign.