Jump to Main ContentJump to Primary Navigation
Top

7 Greatest Football Chants

fans.png

Ask a man to sing and 99% of the time he'll look at you've like you've just killed his goldfish. Place him in a football stadium and opening up the lungs for a group warble becomes, oddly, compulsory. To celebrate the arrival of new book Who Are Ya? Football's Best Ever Chants, author Gershon Portnoi has handpicked his top 7 soccer terrace songs, ever.

7. Leyton Orient fans have taken to diminutive but rather small winger Dean Cox in a big way since his arrival at Brisbane Road. The 5ft 4 midfielder is nicknamed ‘Tiny’ and the O’s fans sing this song to the fittingly traditional East End tune of ‘Knees up Mother Brown’: “We’ve got Tiny Cox / We’ve got Tiny Cox / We’ve got Tiny / We’ve got Tiny / We’ve got Tiny Cox”

6. Former Forest and Birmingham striker Stern John was the recipient of this superbly-clever chant – it wouldn’t have sounded out of place at a chess match, such was its intellect. This was sung to the tune of ‘Quartermaster’s Store’: “He’s big / He's fast / His first name should come last / Stern John / Stern John”

5. Bury striker Lenny John Lewis became a cult hero with a couple of goals from the bench. The Shakers fans sung this to the Italian opera tune ‘La Donna e Mobile’: “His name’s a department store / You know he’s gonna score”

4. Huddersfield Town sing this about their free-scoring striker Lee Novak to the tune of Sloop John B: “We’ve got Novak / We’ve got Nova-ak / Our carpets are filthy / We’ve got Novak”

3. Olympiakos fans chant this tune to their manager, former Newcastle advertising-hoarding-kicker, Temuri Ketsbaia, to the tune of ‘Sex on Fire’ by Kings of Leon: “Wooooooaaaah Temuri Ketsbaia”

2. I like this Celtic chant because it’s wrong on so many levels. First of all, Shunsuke Nakamura is Japanese so is less likely to eat a traditional Chinese dish. And as for his likely political allegiances, well… This is to the tune of Winter Wonderland: “There’s only one Nakamura / One Nakamura / He eats Chow Mein / He votes Sinn Fein / Walking in a Nakamura wonderland”

1.When Rangers goalkeeper Andy Goram was revealed to be mildly schizophrenic, quick-witted fans chanted this to the tune of ‘Guantanamera’: “Two Andy Gorams / There’s only two Andy Gorams”

Image: Rex

Related

keeps2.jpg

New longest headed goal scored

Wayne Rooney.jpg

How to score with a bicycle kick

boot.png

Is this the future of football boots?

Comments

More

Manchester United youngster pulls off brilliant rainbow flick golazo

Frightening talent

28 Apr 2016

Robbie Savage tells us how Wales can beat England this summer

And one man is going to be pretty important

26 Apr 2016

This 35-yard scissor kick is the goal of the season

Utterly outrageous

25 Apr 2016

13 things not to do when running a marathon

It’s already tough enough - don’t make it 26.2 miles of pure hell by Danielle Richardson

22 Apr 2016

The 10 closest Football League finishes

When it goes down to the wire

21 Apr 2016

The scary but exciting world of freediving

by Kevin Perry

20 Apr 2016

Harry Kane: "I'd play in goal for England"

England's great striking hope talks Euros, animals & Justin Bieber by Dave Fawbert

15 Apr 2016

Football's Greatest Comebacks

When teams just don't know they're beaten by Dave Fawbert

15 Apr 2016

This is what it's like to support the craziest football club in the UK

Seven managers, two divisions & a chairman wanted in Albania by Dave Fawbert

12 Apr 2016

Marseille fans protest against own team in the oddest way possible

11 Apr 2016