One of the greatest Twitter accounts in the whole wide internet is @amazonmoviereviews, which highlights hilarious film reviews left on Amazon which either completely miss the point, or are deliberately comedic. Excellent example:
And, in general, Amazon is pretty fertile ground for finding hilarious reviews of things. But, ladies and gentlemen, we’re delighted to announce that we may have found a new winner of ‘best review ever’.
This right here is ‘The Beach Behemoth Giant Inflatable 12-Foot Pole-to-Pole Beach Ball by Sol Coastal’.
It’s a massive bloody beach ball. Look at how big it is (assuming that’s not a tiny man).
Look at the people having fun with it.
And if you’re still in any doubt as to just how big it is, it’s this big:
The company’s own descriptions suggest that they understand the inherently ridiculous nature of their product, as they write:
“The Beach Behemoth was first recorded in writing by Spanish conquistadors in 1521, as they observed several native populations worshipping the gargantuan orbs as minor sun gods. In awe of the Behemoth’s remarkable stature, the conquistadors named it El Gigante. Then they all had a rockin’ beach party.”
They also recommend that “you inflate your Behemoth with an electric pump. The only human to ever attempt manual inflation is our intern, Stefano, and he’s still blowing to this day”.
But what’s it actually like? Well, one review from last year hinted at the danger that lurked within with K. Ewing writing: “Our youth group has had a ton of laughs from this ball. You have to be careful though, it’ll power bounce you to the ground or up in the air!”
But no review is ever going to beat this one, which has now gone viral.
Behold the greatest two-star review you’re ever going to read:
Naturally, people loved it.
There were further sightings of the runaway beast hurtling through Florida:
And tragic stories of the true cost of the rampage:
Be careful out there people, and be particularly wary of giant 12-foot beach balls making their way across the mainland.