Every single Instagram you will see during the snowy weather
Snow on the road outside your house? How original!
In case you hadn’t noticed, it is snowing. To use the archaic past participle: readers, it hath snew.
And people have taken to Instagram to let you know: everyone, opening their app at exactly the same time to show you in exactly the same way. Isn’t technology breathtaking?
Luckily we’ve rounded up every single variations on the theme of #snowcontent so you won’t have to waste your precious data on your identikit timeline.
A snowy picture of the road outside their house
You can’t unfollow your mum, can you?
A cat frolicking in some snow
Catloverwhoalsolovescommunism has uploaded two new photos: they are both of a slightly blurry black cat walking slowly along a frozen path. Seven likes apiece.
A “Keeping warm!” shot with a cup of cocoa
The winter equivalent of the “I just can’t start the day without my precious java” shot.
A really crap, kinda brown snowman
They’ve spent four hours making this. They can’t feel their hands. They’re googling the symptoms of hypothermia. The snow — sad-looking and brown — kinda looks like it might contain a dog egg. You might have to throw this one a pity like.
A crappy snow-related injury/bruised knee with a sad face
If you would’ve hurt yourself more you’d probably get more likes. Something to ponder on the way home, I guess. Walk safely now. Or don’t.
Your colleague Stan taking pictures of his horrible, purple hands
I’m really worried about them. They look like they’re made out of Pepperami.
A shot of some snowy rooftops
LOOK, SIR! IT’S JUST LIKE DICKENSIAN LONDON! Only you’re paying £860 pcm for a room in a shared flat in Peckham.
A snow penis
It’s a damn penis, look.
A messages on windscreens
We get it: you wrote “Send Nudes” on the windscreen of your next door’s van. What are you gonna do when friendly neighbour Paul sends you something heinous and hairy over text? That’ll be your fault, then.
A shot of snow that includes an inside window sill
A portal into the interior lives of people you haven’t seen since uni. They own a lot of Warhammer gear and really need to get the Windex out. Squashed moths all over the pane.
Train cancellation with an angry "Grr! Sort it out @TfL"
Just stay at home, then.