Got a load of mismatched tupperware sitting in a drawer in your kitchen? You’re not alone
Growing up is weird. One minute you’re desperately willing yourself to hit the magic milestone of 18 so you can do all the fun stuff and get out into the world then, suddenly, you blink and you’re organising a thirtieth birthday party and desperately hoping that enough people will turn up to make it look respectable.
But while getting older might seem a little scary, never forget that there’s a good few hundred million other people in the same boat as you. Despite what you thought when you hit 18, it turns out you’re not special, which is something of a disappointment in a way but, as this hilarious new meme demonstrates, also quite a comfort.
For, as we all age together, it seems that we all have the same weird little quirks and habits, that we’ve all collectively adopted, despite never having ever discussed it with anyone else.
Even if you’re not 35 yet, if you don’t recognise yourself in at least one of these Twitter posts then you’re either a) a liar or b) a liar.
By age 35 you should have a huge box of cables but you can't throw them out because you're pretty sure you still need a couple of them but you're not sure which ones— Lori G 🌸 (@LoriG) May 19, 2018
By age 35 you should have an entire cabinet filled with Tupperware containers. That don’t match. Just a bunch of random bottoms and tops that come cascading out on you every time you open the door.— Danielle H (@FoodosaurusRex) May 22, 2018
By age 35 you should have like 2 real friends both of whom live in other states and around 700 online friends with whom your relationship is so tenuous that a simple opinion about a comic book movie could end it instantly.— MR'A Stoudemire (@Bahbuto) May 21, 2018
By age 35 you should have at least two thirds of your hard drive space taken up by recursively nested copies of the hard drives from all your previous computers— Alex Kerfoot (@akerfoot) May 20, 2018
Plastic bag hoarding
by age 35 you should have a kitchen cabinet dedicated entirely to plastic bags that contain other, smaller plastic bags— vytas (@peakysblinder) May 20, 2018
When life admin gets in the way of fun
By age 35 you should have a huge library of video games but no time to play them.— Liz Katz (@LizKatzOfficial) May 21, 2018
By age 35 you should run into friends and say "WE SHOULD HANG OUT SOON!" twice a week. You will never hang out. You'll just scream this at each other until one of you dies.— Luke Trayser (@trukelayser) May 20, 2018
By age 35 you should have at least one fork in your cutlery drawer that you just don’t like, and actively frown at if you accidentally grab it.— Nutella Enchanted (@chrisopotamia) May 20, 2018
By age 35 you should have a shelf full of books you can't read because they're not ebooks, but can't throw away either because you intend to read them.— Kiran Jonnalagadda (@jackerhack) May 20, 2018
By age 35 you should have a junk drawer filled with USB flash drives you’re reluctant to throw out because you don’t know what’s on them but are reluctant to plug in because... you don’t know what’s on them— aloria 🦔 (@aloria) May 20, 2018
Just getting old
By age 35 you will routinely exercise in t-shirts memorializing life events older than the interns on your team.— Steven Sinofsky (@stevesi) May 21, 2018
By age 35, you should have at least 10 framed pictures of Jeff Goldblum in your home.— Sam Sykes (@SamSykesSwears) May 20, 2018
But, look, it doesn’t matter if you do every single one of the above, or if you feel that you don’t have your life together.
Because this is a fact:
Listen. Meghan Markle wasn't a duchess til age 36 so stop telling me what I should have by age 35.— Jessica Ellis (@baddestmamajama) May 21, 2018