Jump to Main ContentJump to Primary Navigation
Top

How To Fake Enthusiasm For Bad Presents

present.jpg

So it's Christmas. Again. You're about to unwrap a present from your mother-in-law, who waits impatiently for your reaction. But disaster strikes. She's got you comedy Bart Simpson socks.

Abysmal presents are a depressing part of life, but how can we avoid upsetting those who inflict them upon us? Mark Westbrook – senior acting coach at Acting Coach Scotland – guides us through the tricky art of festive sincerity.

“There’s a quote from Hamlet”, says Westbrook, “which reads ‘O’er step not the modesty of nature’. Or, in modern English, ‘Don’t overdo it’. People can spot insincerity a mile off, so the important thing is to get rid of the idea of faking or pretending, and just be as truthful as possible.”

“Instead of talking about the gift itself, focus on the person who gave it to you. So, when you open it, react by saying something that is absolutely true, like ‘Oh, you are so thoughtful!’ Regardless of whether you like it or not, they were thoughtful to buy it for you, so there’s no fakery involved here. If you make it about the present, you’ll have to pretend, but if you make it about the person, you can be warm, loving and sincere.”

“When you’re unwrapping the present, it’s important to smile”, he continues. “Visualise something you would have actually wanted, rather than thinking about what’s there in front of you.”

“Good body language is also vital. Try not to tense up as you tear off the paper, and look the person straight in the eyes, rather than looking down at the gift. This is an excellent way of distracting and deflecting. A great magician I knew told me, ‘if you look at the object, they’ll focus on that, but if you look at the person, they’ll focus on you’.”

“Make sure the situation doesn’t drag on for too long. Most of what I teach is about people trying to get what they want from each other. So, once you’ve opened the gift and responded in the manner above, immediately say something like, ‘You must open this one now!’ This will take their attention away from the present they’ve just given you.”

“And finally, give them a hug! A physical response is much easier to fake than an emotional response, plus it’s a great excuse to put down that awful present…”

Image: Rex

Related

IMG_0114.JPG

The £2 Christmas dinner

ChristmasDinner_HERO.jpg

The perfect Christmas dinner

cocks.png

Emergency Christmas Cocktails

Comments

More

This terrifying parasite infects fish and then becomes their tongue

The stuff of nightmares

by Tom Victor
28 Apr 2017

Donald Trump said that he thought being president would be easier

Yeah so did I

by Gary Ogden
28 Apr 2017

If your name is on this list, you’re probably an actual Viking

Does this give you a licence to pillage? Probably

by Gary Ogden
27 Apr 2017

The public voted on how to make toast and got it completely wrong

People cannot be trusted on ANYTHING

by Dave Fawbert
27 Apr 2017

Tom Watson MP on the political motivations of cinema despots

The deputy leader of the Labour Party assesses eight screen tyrants

by Ralph Jones
27 Apr 2017

We went hunting for ancient gold off the Welsh coast

Hunting for nuggets from the doomed Royal Charter

by Ralph Jones
27 Apr 2017

London Marathon hero has had his entry fee next year covered

Yeah, they can probably call it even now

by Matt Tate
26 Apr 2017

Inside the dark art of (actually decent) sports headline puns

An enduring British pastime - but why?

by Tom Usher
26 Apr 2017

Oh great, now Paul Nuttall's comparing himself to Gandhi

Mate, that's not how it works

by Tom Victor
26 Apr 2017

Jeremy Corbyn would be Prime Minister if only under-40s could vote

But they're 20 points behind overall

by Gary Ogden
26 Apr 2017