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Here's what people who became single in their 30s or 40s rediscovered about themselves


The thing about modern life is that, increasingly, nothing is seen as weird.

Once upon a time, norms would dictate that, by the time you hit 30, you should be happily married with aspirations to own a labrador and a night – likely Friday night –that is defined by takeaway fish & chips and a film you’ve seen 45 times but it’s an easy watch isn’t it. 

If that’s your life, then good on you; labradors are extremely great dogs, after all. There’s something enviable about having everything in place for the rest of your life. Here’s to shared Netflix accounts. But for some people it pans out differently, and the idea that you need to be in a settled relationship by a certain age feels pretty outdated. 

That said, people who come out of a long-term thing in their thirties or fourties and suddenly find themselves identifying as single must find it a bit of a shock to the system.

One moment you’re arguing about leaving wet towels on the floor, the next you’re flying solo, unobliged to send incoherent drunken texts at 2am explaining that you accidentally stumbled into the casino, casually browsing dating sites and wondering if it’s fine to talk about your passion for Dungeons & Dragons in your bio (it definitely is).

Confession: I can only presume that all of this is the case. I’m only just into the latter half of my 20s and I don’t have a clue where I’ll be when they end. Luckily, people who fall into those age groups are just as into that internet thing, and they’ve been congregating on Reddit to talk about what they rediscovered about themselves when they suddenly became single again. 

It took this guy years to gain the confidence to strike up a conversation with the opposite sex. 

single 1

This Redditor was in an unhappy relationship for ages and ending it helped them find their independence again.

Single 2

These guys are just sick and tired of people feeling sorry for them. BACK OFF YEAH?

Single 3

There were loads of comments about people just enjoying the freedom and the opportunities that suddenly presented themselves. 

Single 4
Single 5
Single 6
Single 8

For this guy, becoming single meant he got to realise the ambitions that his ex talked him out of. 

Single 7

The excellently-named Hillbillygoat went full backpacker after his split. 

Single 9

For some, ending a loveless relationship actually allowed them to rediscover the friendship they’d lost. We’re in agreement with the commenter underneath on this particular example, though. 

Single 10

And we’ll let the final say go to Ajarndaniel, who now gets to keep all his weed for himself and lives in Arabia. Good on him. 

Single 11

(Main image: Rex)



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