"Lost your bike?" is the tedious, all-too-predictable joke that the cyclist has to endure upon turning up to after work drinks with their front wheel and saddle in hand. There are only so many times you can stomach saying "No, I just locked it up round the corner" through clenched teeth before you cave, leaving said seat and spinner on your bike to avoid further hassle. At which point they're promptly nicked.
Enter stage right our hero, Seatylock. As its name hints, this leather saddle packs a lock underneath its padded exterior, allowing cyclists to have their pint safe in the knowledge that anyone looking to pinch their bike and/or saddle will need a sizeable arsenal to do the job.
Available in two models - the curvier Comfort and the slim-lined Trekking - the Seatylock consists of a saddle and a folding metal frame lock covered in an industrial plastic.
Compatible with any standard saddle pillar, the Seatylock disconnects from its own clamp, allowing you to lock it to an appropriate bike stand. As the test video demonstrates (see below), it offers a great deal more frustration to potential thieves than the average chain lock.
Currently looking for funding on Kickstarter, you can place an order for a Seatylock for around £52 plus postage. Smugness comes as standard.