Aiming low and achieving predictably low results, 21-year-old criminal-in-training Benjamin Sickles decided to rob a Subway restaurant last week.
Beginning with a subtle smash of three glass windows and a glass door, he broke his way in at 2:23AM and things went from dumb to dumber.
He failed to get money out of the cash register so after throwing cups in frustration, he grabbed nine bags of crisps instead. When the local police rolled up, a trail of crisps led them to the nearest high school where the suspect was found on the steps. It was the same high school he graduated from three years back.
He's been charged with burglary, criminal trespass, theft, and criminal mischief because being unforgivably stupid still isn't classed as a crime.
(Image: Rex Features)