Blue wine is coming and there’s not a damned thing you can do about it

"Red, white, and blue." No, this isn't a handy nationalistic chant in time for Brexit, but what waiters will soon be saying to you when you ask them about their wine choices.

This is because a Spanish company has defied tradition, nature, and the Lord Jesus Christ by creating the world's first blue wine.

The wine, called Gik and boasting notes not a millions miles from Riesling, is apparently made by mixing red and white grapes, which according to our Year 3 colour wheel makes absolutely no sense.

Better than its complete disregard for science and your brand new blue tongue, however, is the fact a bottle only costs £7.50 and will be available later this summer. 

The whole thing was designed by a bunch of twenty year olds "without any wine tradition", who are urging people to "forget everything [they] know about wine." 

DONE.