Ion Audio have only gone and made a Dreamcast-a-like turntable which lights up like a pair of Nineties trainers whenever it's turned on. Just think how handy you'll be at parties when everyone's forgotten the lighting rig and also the soundsystem. Bam, you turn up with your retro-futuristic Illuminate Turntable and light up the place like the Ministry of Sound on Bonfire Night.
"But we don't have an extensive vinyl collection, pal!" Your fellow party-goers complain. "We can only play, like, two records with this set-up, and one of them is Dark Side of the Moon, which is totally inappropriate for this vibe." No bother, you laugh, and point to the USB port for converting vinyl into digital files. You've really thought of everything. Everyone is laughing, everyone is cheering.
If you think forking out £119.99 is worth the adulation, this could be your actual future. Alternatively, you could just keep it in your house and look at it, because it's quite nice to be honest.