Gaming

This might be the greatest Rocket League goal ever scored

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Gary Ogden
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Football is pretty big over here in the UK. Lots of people like it. We’ve heard them. But not everybody likes it, and we think we know why – it’s because there aren’t any CARS in it. If this was football with cars, cars that flipped, flew, sometimes exploded, then man, they’d put that on the flag.

Welcome to Rocket League. If Rocket League was a real sport, we’d happily swap old Queen Elizabeth for a car that shot bubbles out its pipe and scored goals like this on the regular. We would bow down and kiss the bumper of our new monarch, Explosive Flippy Car Goal Scorer.

Of course, things would get complicated when our new leader was required to repeat the goal at national events, mainly because nothing like this will ever occur again. It was a total one off, and shall be consigned to the history books – specifically the one called A List Of The Very Greatest Things That Have Ever Happened And Will Never Happen Again. It will sit alongside that time we completed Minesweeper in five moves, the time that man in that band caught that beer at that festival and that time you had sex.

Either way, just be thankful it happened. And watch it again and again and again. Don’t blink. Absorb the majesty. Absorb your majesty. 

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Gary Ogden

Shortlist writer and "the least woke person in the office", Gary Ogden, likes horror movies, Cheestrings, tapping his leg under the desk, "having a drink", PDAs, not having eczema anymore, hiding from responsibility, screaming into the mirror whenever he is alone, and assorted other things. Mainly the eczema thing though. @garyblogden

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