The plight of a tightly trousered Australian woman has added a new dimension to the term "fashion victim" - and it's not as funny as it sounds.
The Journal of Neurology, Neurosurgery and Psychiatry has published a case in which a 35-year-old woman presented "with severe weakness of both ankles". The cause? She'd spent a day helping a family member move house, squatting to unpack and move boxes while wearing skinny jeans.
The tension in the fabric had restricted the movement of the muscles in her calves, preventing them from expanding while contracting and thus compressing muscle and nerve groups throughout the day.
After experiencing severe pain in her legs, she eventually collapsed. When she was taken to hospital, doctors diagnosed her injuries as resulting from "compartment syndrome", which had crushed the nerves in her calves.
The Journal report noted that this case presented a new risk to wearing overly tight skinny jeans: it was already known that tight trousers could result in lesions of a nerve group in the thigh - quite besides the threat of urinary infection and long-term testicular damage.
Previous medical advice on trouser style (yep, some of us are that inept at dressing ourselves that medical practitioners are asked these things) has stated that men should leave plenty of room around the crotch, and that you're likely to do yourself a mischief if you restrict movement down there anyway.
With that in mind, here's our guide to selecting a non-threatening jean style - because some of you clearly need educating.
Perfect for guys with bigger thighs, generous in the upper leg yet defined with tapering. Best worn with layered Tees, hi-tops or trainers.
Generally suits taller men. These jean look better when worn slightly too long. Best worn with shoes featuring an elongated toe.
Best for a gym-bodied man – skinny guys disappear in them; tubbier men gain pounds. Wear with layered sportswear and hi-tops.
Not as extreme as the skinny fit, this jean suits the shorter, slimmer man. The jean of choice to pair with contemporary tailoring.
Best suits an athletic shape. Opt for worn-in treatments as this style should mould to the body for full effect. Pair with brogues or desert boots.