Is there more to life than just being really, really, really good looking? How can we be expected to teach children to learn how to read if they can't even fit inside a building?
13 years have passed since we first met Derek Zoolander - and while these humdingers are still being pondered over today, it turns out that the film's legacy has had a far wider impact than anyone could imagine.
Worryingly/hilariously, it turns out that much of the 2001 comedy's plot, forecasting the state of what was to come in the ludicrous world of high-end fashion, was pretty much bang on the money.
Here are the amazing examples of how Zoolander predicted the state of fashion and celebrity today.
UNDERGROUND MALE MODEL FIGHTS
David Bowie umpiring an underground ‘walk-off’ between Derek and Hansel? It wasn’t too far off the mark, as it happens - male models in New York have been meeting covertly to go a few rounds in underground fight clubs for a few years now. Usually held around fashion week, Friday Night Throwdown is something of a cult event for those posers looking to let off some steam.
HOMELESS-INSPIRED FASHION RANGE
“A way of life inspired by homeless, vagrants and crack whores,” boomed Will Ferrell’s Mugatu about his garbage-strewn fashion range Derelict, as a tramp-turned-manikin looked on in bewilderment. Incredibly, the tasteless idea became a catwalk reality in Milan in 2010 when Vivienne Westwood introduced a winter men’s collection dubbed ‘The Roving Vagrant’. Taking inspiration from the trolley-lugging vagabonds who don layers to face the harsh urban environment, it proved how laughably out of touch high-end fashion can be.
Cast your mind back to the scene where Derek whips around an army of make-up artists, treating us to the first flash of Blue Steel. Remember that oversized black-and-white bandana covering his furrowed brow? While novel in 2001, it’s had numerous catwalk incarnations since, leading us to the only conclusion that it was Derek's promotion of the accessory that paved the way.
Blue steel always existed; we just didn’t have a name for it before Derek Zoolander curled his lower lip in a majestic fashion. So when male fashion icon David Gandy was looking to launch a campaign for a UK charity back in 2012, dubbing it the Blue Steel Appeal was a no-brainer, really.
WORLD FAMOUS HAND MODELS
Oh how we chuckled when Derek exposed J.P. Prewett as the world’s greatest hand model, remembering his fine digits from the Fall 1973 Bulova Watch Catalogue. And while Prewett keeping his mitts encased in a hyperbaric chamber no doubt verged on the ridiculous, it’s not all that wackier than real-life UK hand model Gemma Howorth, who's insured her own for £5m, and, if that weren't odd enough, even wears gloves when she sunbathes.
AWARD SHOW STAGE INVASION
While Derek might not have known what he was doing as he cockily strutted on stage to collect what he wrongly believed was his VH1 Fashion Award, the gaffe inadvertently paved the way for the likes of Kanye West, a self-professed fashionista himself, to do similar at the 2012 VMA's. Interrupting Taylor Swift mid-speech to profess his unhappiness over pal Beyoncé’s snub, West’s meltdown caused him Zoolander-levels of embarrassment in the ensuing weeks, and, like poor Derek, it’s a moment he may never live down.
DESIGNERS USING SWEATSHOPS
Woeful perm aside, Mugatu was guilty of two heinous crimes: 1) inventing the piano neck-tie, and 2) attempting to assassinate the Malaysian Prime Minister when he threatens to stop his plans of ending sweatshop labour. But the curly-haired designer’s fashion brand wasn’t the only one exploiting third world workers to churn out its garb: there’s been a big crack down on major real-life clothing brands of late, with companies like Victoria’s Secret, GAP and Nike just a few to incur the wrath of heckle-heavy protesters.
(Images: Rex Features, BBC, AllStar)