Yes, you did not misread that headline: it turns out that there is, in fact, one, singular good thing about Southern Rail.
For those not in the know, Southern Rail is probably the worst run enterprise since Enron which specialises in not running trains on time, not having enough trains, not having enough drivers, annoying those drivers so much that they go on strike, completely screwing over customers and, yet, somehow not being stripped of its franchise by the government. It’s remarkable really, it’s like that guy at work who’s always ill, never does anything when he’s in, but HR can’t pin enough on him to fire him. You’ve almost got to admire it. Almost.
Anyway, to sum up, they’re a train company so bad that The Darkness wrote an entire song about them, containing the memorable line: “Fuck you, Southern Trains, we’re not getting anywhere.”
But, there is one (ONE) good thing about them.
Patrick Dalton, well known for his legendary Shit London Facebook and Twitter pages, which celebrate the glory of the most wonderfully awful bits of London life, discovered a truly excellent life hack while on board one of the godforsaken trains the other day.
You fancy a beer but don’t have a bottle opener handy? No problem.
Understandably, he was elated:
OK, maybe not that elated.
I'm going to dial that back to 'The Fonz', I was over excited.— Patrick Dalton (@shitlondon) November 13, 2017
However, it was a story with a tragic ending.
Left the train to discover I've lost one of the rubber bits from my earphones. The Lord giveth, the Lord taketh away.— Patrick Dalton (@shitlondon) November 13, 2017
However, it turns out that maybe this devilishly excellent activity isn’t just restricted to Southern; it seems that C2C/Greater Anglia is getting in on the act too:
You've clearly never been on the train out to Southend on a hot day. This is 95% of the activity on the train...— Emily Turner (@ETWriteHome) November 13, 2017
Really, this should become mandatory on all trains, shouldn’t it?
Although, as this guy pointed out, we shouldn’t really need it.
We were not aware of this, it is brilliant, that person should get a Nobel Prize for Science or summat. However, we are professional drinkers. So are never without the requisite equipment\paraphernalia.— Gandermonium (@Gandermonium) November 14, 2017