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This is why this scientist is asking for pictures of your penis

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Gary Ogden
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This is why this scientist is asking for pictures of your penis

Fancy sending a picture of your weiner to a woman, for SCIENCE?

Dick pics are a thing, 80% unfortunately, 20% fortunately, but regardless of whether or not you’ve sent one in the past, would you send one in the future, if you knew it was going to help the scientific community, and perhaps humanity, at large?

Well, that’s a question for you that we won’t press you for, but perhaps a researcher in the US might.

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Yep, Missouri State University assistant professor of sociology Alicia Walker actually wants your penis pics (yeah, even you! I know!), because it’s all part of a study she is currently conducting. Essentially what’s she’s trying to determine is how the size of someone’s penis (or the size they perceive it to be) relates to their overall “physical and mental health, self-esteem, ability to interact, sexual activity, and tendency to use a condom during intercourse.”

What Walker wants is 3,600 men, aged 22 years old and above, to upload their oak photos and answer an online questionnaire -  the photos are needed as proof of the answers (yeah, sure). 

“These are not sexy pictures. These are clinical pictures.” Walker said, echoing my Tinder bio.

The reasons behind the study, Walker says, is because “A lot of men carry secret anxiety because of their penis size…

“Penis size, in general, is the source of a lot of curiosity in American culture.”

Of course, to many, this may sound like a woman simply deciding she wants to see loads of pictures of willies simply for banter, unadulterated swinging penis banter. But stop yourself right there, naysayers - it’s all been officially approved. Missouri State issued the following statement:

“Academic freedom is a core component of a liberal arts university. As such, faculty members have broad discretion in their research choices. When students, staff and/or faculty conduct research at Missouri State University that involves human participants, they are required to submit an application to the Institutional Review Board.”

All legit, this dick quest, then. And you can help! If you fancy sending across your winky to a stranger on the internet, then simply head on over here and follow the instructions. No Photoshop though! You can always tell by the way it bends.

(Image: Getty)

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Gary Ogden

Shortlist writer and "the least woke person in the office", Gary Ogden, likes horror movies, Cheestrings, tapping his leg under the desk, "having a drink", hiding from responsibility, screaming into the mirror whenever he is alone, and assorted other things. Mainly the screaming thing though. @garyblogden

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