It isn't too late to turn back. It isn't too late to save yourself, your dreams, and that bit of chocolate digestive you just swallowed from being tormented by a recently caught Russian mutant piranha.
Please. Think about what what you are about to do.
No? Okay. Fishermen by the Kama River in central Russia’s Udmurt Republic recently caught this sharp-toothed, eel-bodied black beast and promptly, as they say in the business, freaked the eff out.
The 20cm long creature was believed to be a mutated version of a Chinese sleeper (Perccottus glenii), which should normally look like this:
However, there is some debate, with people online claiming it was either a piranha or a mutated European eel (Anguilla anguilla).
Whatever it is, it's hella freaky and - we have on good authority - is coming for you in your sleep tonight.