What's green, weighs around 900kg, goes from 0-60 mph in under three seconds and - should you find a track long enough - can restyle your hair at 174 mph?
We were hoping to come up with a creative punch line that involved Kermit the Frog, but the task was beyond us. The straight answer is the new Lotus 3-Eleven, the fastest ever road car from the British manufacturer.
You don't get much by way of comfort for your £82,000: there's only one seat and a few inches of windscreen, with no radio or Bluetooth connectivity in sight. What you do get is a supercharged V6, capable of out-grunting supercars twice as expensive as Lotus' lightweight creation.
Only 311 (hence the name) of the open-topped sportster will go into production, with an option of a road-ready (£82,000) or track-ready (£115,200) model.
We would say it's the ideal machine for popping down to the shops - but only if you were planning on picking up a packet of chewing gum and a small sandwich.