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This is why it’s actually better if you’re not good-looking

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Gary Ogden
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Turns out women are happier with less attractive blokes

So it turns out that maybe all those Adam Sandler films are right: average shlubs can get with impossibly beautiful women and form a successful relationship. I mean, it’s never been anything I can identify with because I am out of every single female’s league, like so far above it that I have no option but to have sex with invisible beings from another dimension, a higher plane. But still, YOU probably sympathise with it.

The reason for Adam Sandler’s success can be reinforced by a study carried out by Florida State University, that found out that women are actually happier when they’re in relationships with less attractive men. For the research, they studied 113 recently married couples in their late twenties and ranked them by attractiveness, before giving them a questionnaire about their desire to keep in shape and good-looking.

What they found was that women who were paired with stonking hunks felt way more pressure to stay fit and diet, and in some cases even developed an obsession for it.

This is why it's actually better if you're not good-looking

Researcher Tania Reynolds said, “The results reveal that having a physically attractive husband may have negative consequences for wives, especially if those wives are not particularly attractive. The research suggests there might be social factors playing a role in women’s disordered eating.”

Bad news for me, obviously. However, on the other hand, the women with Adam Sandlers and Kevin Jameses felt the opposite way - they felt more appreciated and party to a stronger relationship.

This was because the insecure men felt the need to compensate with present-buying, sexual favours, extra housework and just all-round general kindness. The study said:

“The husbands seemed to be basically more committed, more invested in pleasing their wives when they felt that they were getting a pretty good deal.”

I mean, really, you should be doing all that stuff for your partner no matter how far your hair goes back on your head, but I guess some men are dickheads. Me? I do the hoovering for all the inter-dimensional amoebas I shag on the daily.

(Image: New Line Cinema)

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Gary Ogden

Shortlist writer and "the least woke person in the office", Gary Ogden, likes horror movies, Cheestrings, tapping his leg under the desk, "having a drink", PDAs, not having eczema anymore, hiding from responsibility, screaming into the mirror whenever he is alone, and assorted other things. Mainly the eczema thing though. @garyblogden

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