Some truly appalling - and extremely funny - behaviour
There’s nothing quite like the sinking feeling of seeing two bouncers of Goliath-esque proportions calmly but undeniably striding over towards you, as you protest your innocence that “no I didn’t mean to throw that drink over that girl, genuinely I was just celebrating a massive tune coming on and my hand accidentally collided with her but oh dear I appear to be too drunk to actually explain that that’s what happened and oh god the bouncer’s just picked me up and I’m definitely getting chucked out and - oh yep there it is my head connecting with the pavement and brilliant it’s raining and I’m soaked”.
Still, at least it’s a good story for the next morning when you’re wading through the hazy, drunken events of the night before - and luckily, it turns out that plenty of other people have had epic stories of being chucked out of things which they’re only too willing to share in the search for some sweet retweets.
Twitter user Brooke Rogers started the soul-bearing with this tweet reflecting on the behaviour of people on the social media network:
Imagine if people on Twitter behaved this way in real life. Half of y’all would get kicked out of a Cracker Barrel with your attitudes.— International House of Brooke 🌻 (@bkerogers) May 10, 2018
Before asking people to share the ‘best reason you’ve been kicked out of an event, building or group”.
Ok, now I’m curious. Quote tweet with the best reason you’ve been kicked out of an event, building or group.— International House of Brooke 🌻 (@bkerogers) May 11, 2018
Naturally, there were some absolutely cracking replies, ranging from celebrities to regular joes, all united in sharing their moments of shame, hilarity, unjustness and everything else in between.
Take it away guys…
I was kicked out of a Mexican taqueria one Cinco de Mayo because the chef’s sister was drunk and trying to fight me. Long story short I was asked to leave and then got assaulted with a basket of tortilla chips. It was delicious. https://t.co/B4b4kObbvk— Christopher Throbin (@adrinktothepast) May 14, 2018
On tour I got kicked out of the hotel I was staying because I had a row with Jimmy Somerville and he told a security guard I was a mad fan. When I tried to get back in I was kicked out again.— Richard Coles (@RevRichardColes) May 12, 2018
Kicked out of a Kenny G concert for yelling, “Turn the fire alarm off!”, when he held a single note for what seemed like 8 minutes. (Admitting I was at a Kenny G concert is the most embarrassing part of this story.)— CanadianMom (@mojo2172) May 12, 2018
I was once kicked out of a pub by the assistant manger as I was horrendously drunk, incredibly loud and obnoxious. The twist? I was the manager of the pub and the assistant manager was my mum. 😏— Serenity Seeker (@ianperkins69) May 12, 2018
I saw a guy get kicked out of our local in the 80s for eating Brie on a crusty baguette. The same guy had just shared a line of cocaine off the actual bar with the landlord but the landlord had previously banned all things French from his establishment. What a local that was.— Emily Sarah Wang (@EmilySarahWang2) May 12, 2018
Years ago at an All You Can Eat Chinese - buffet. The Sunday special for $12.98. I was 9-months pregnant, hungry and on my 7th plate. I was asked to leave, thats when I found out that they don't truly mean #allYouCanEat. I'm sure they would still reconize me today.— Air Sign (@BlkLightDisco) May 14, 2018
Got thrown out of my English class when asked to give a short speech about the importance of defense . It went " The undeniable truth of the inportance of defense is simple, how else do we keep de people off de grass" I was removed from the class.— Shawry (@shawry5064) May 13, 2018
Accidentally crashed an AA Christmas party. Kept offering people a glass of boxed wine. Was shown the door and the back of a gentleman’s hand. Fair.— david wrigley (@wriglemethis) May 12, 2018
Wasn’t me but my dads mate got thrown out of a working men’s club in London for doing God Save The Queen by Sex Pistols on Karaoke and then ran up and kicked the bingo machine up in the air at the end and a small riot ensued.— G (@Lenzo357) May 13, 2018
I got thrown out and banned from Woolworths for moving Eddy Grant vinyl albums from the reggae section to the pop music section.— Bobala C (@CarruthersBob) May 13, 2018
Shoe store. My cousin and I were impatient and tried to grab a pair of boots instead of waiting for the worker with the ladder and ended up creating a shoe avalanche that sent - not exaggerating - 100ish pairs (an entire row) crashing to the ground. It was raining shoes. https://t.co/Vpr31HWvUm— Marybeth Glenn (@MBGlenn) May 11, 2018