How many 18-35 year-olds does it take to change a lightbulb?
Thousands, we imagine.
Oh we don't know, it could be the adult ball pools, cereal cafes, crazy golf, ironic Nickelodeon tees worn to the office or the fact everyone's walking around catching Pokemon, but it seem hipsters are so intent on making us relive our childhoods that we may be at crisis point, facing the possibility of infantilising ourselves until we’re all lumps of babbling goo incapable of changing a tyre, wirring a plug or, yes, replacing a bulb.
And here comes another worrying development: Trade Union, a new bar in London’s Wapping, comes with a slide to whizz you into the main bar and restaurant area like some Silicon Valley type slinking from their desk to their afternoon sleep chamber.
As well as the slide, there’s a veritable tick list of all things catering to the cool quarters - cocktail classes, sourdough pizza served by Bushwick Pizza Co., barista coffee sourced from Colombia, a florists where things are presumably sold by the Instagram, grooming stall for any beard tweaking - but of course the showpiece here is that metal tube, the latest place for East Londoners to get their slide-based thrills since the Olympic Statue was converted into a helter skelter.
On the one hand you could view it as a damning indictment into the faddish state of concept bars; on the other hand, hold our drink...