Every year, it’s exactly the same.
1 January, wake up with a cranium-splitting hangover, swear that never again will we treat our body with the utter contempt that we have throughout the entirety of the previous year, and that this year - this year - we will make some life-altering New Year’s Resolutions which will turn our minds and bodies into the intellectual and physical temples they deserve to be.
And then by, oooh, 4 January - at best - they’ve all gone out the window, with our pitiful attempt at a Dry January reminding yourself just what a worthless waste of flesh you really are.
So here’s a novel idea: how about not bothering with big, dramatic changes that you definitely won’t be able to keep, and picking a set of small, achievable improvements that you might actually be able to accomplish. Imagine how good you’d feel not failing for once.
That’s the idea of #18for2018, which is the brainchild of US author and self-help guru Gretchen Rubin. It’s simple: pick 18 small resolutions and actually bloody do them instead of choosing one or two massive ones which you will give up before February is even on the distant horizon.
Naturally, being a self-help guru, Gretchen has suggested a few for us to get us going:
- Fix my phone headset, which keeps running out of battery
- Set up a home studio for my Facebook show ‘Ask Gretchen Rubin Live’ with better lighting
- Clean out my massive canvas tote bag collection
Hmmm, not sure how applicable they are to the modern man, but still, you get the general idea.
Naturally, insufferable people on the internet have already been sharing their #18for2018 lists which I’ll begrudgingly embed at the bottom of this article so you have some #inspiration for the #goals you have for #newyearnewme.
But here’s a few ideas which will genuinely change your life if you manage to get them done:
- Buy a pack of AA, AAA and 9V batteries and put them in a drawer and remember which drawer you’ve put them in. You’ll thank me later
- Every time you get smashed this year (and you will) actually bloody remember to drink a pint of water before going to bed
- Buy some WD-40 and fix all the squeaky windows and doors in your home
- Listen to ‘Africa’ every single day
- Back up your files
-Buy those nice new pants and socks. You’re worth it
- Read a book, any book, even The World According to Danny Dyer counts. In fact, definitely read that book and not any other one
- Say thanks to the bus driver
- Watch ‘Queen Live at Wembley ‘86’ in full
- At least have a think about doing some running, even if you only get as far as reading this
- Likewise the gym, give this a read and see what you think
- Follow @crap90sfootball
- Get the World Cup fixtures in your diary now
- Stop liking and sharing ‘inspirational’ bollocks on social media
OK, here are the #goals lists, because I guess we have to…
Feeling inspired now? Are you? ARE YOU?
(Image: Rakicevic Nenad)