Food & Drink

A chicken Big Mac exists, and I would like it in my mouth, please

Posted by
Gary Ogden

The humble Big Mac – McDonald’s menu staple since the beginning of time. It is has solved many a problem over the years.

But one problem it has never solved is: what if I want a CHICKEN Big Mac? 

A McChicken Sandwich just isn’t enough – it’s too small, and tragically, contains no Big Mac sauce.

Step in those clever clogs Down Under, then, who have resolved the issue once and for all, by creating exactly the thing that I (and hopefully, you) crave: the chicken Big Mac.

And how does this differ from a normal Big Mac? It has chicken in it. That’s the only difference – everything else remains untouched. Don’t fuck with perfection.

Annoyingly, it’s only available over in Australia, which is bad news Big Mac, if you ask me. I want one, here, now, in England. 

Still, you never know – things catch on. If it proves popular (which it will, clearly), there’s always the chance we could see it in our stores soon enough.

In other news, Australian McDonald’s is also offering cheeseburger flavoured seasoning for their fries, whatever the hell that is. Regardless, I would also like that, here, now, in England, too. Also in my mouth, on my chest, in my hair, my ears, nose and underneath my eyelids.

(Image: McDonald's)


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Gary Ogden

Shortlist writer and "the least woke person in the office", Gary Ogden, likes horror movies, Cheestrings, tapping his leg under the desk, "having a drink", hiding from responsibility, screaming into the mirror whenever he is alone, and assorted other things. Mainly the screaming thing though. @garyblogden

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