TV

The 50 Best Only Fools And Horses Characters

A decent sitcom character needs to be both funny and believable, making it so hard for a writer to create a truly original one. John Sullivan however seemed to find it all too easy. With idiots firmly rooted in reality, Sullivan’s OFAH featured a collection of petty gangsters, spivs, dossers and criminals that we not just laughed at, but somehow knew, like family, like friends.

From the very beginning we were on the side of these losers, chuckling our trousers off with them, even when they did the most terrible and ridiculous things. To think that all these people came out of just one man's head is frankly unbelievable. Here's our top 50, counting down from 50 to 1. Mangetout mangetout.

  • The 50 Best Only Fools And Horses Characters

    50. Mental Mickey

    The lead singer in Rodney's band A Bunch Of Wallies, he could move his legs like Elvis, snarl like Joe Stummer. Eventually Mickey's band would get to number 26 in the charts with their song Boys Will be Boys.

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    49. Heather

    A single mother who Del Boy fell head over heels for in the 1982 Christmas Special. Sadly Heather turned down Del's marriage proposal after her estranged husband got a new job dressing up as Father Christmas.

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    48. Baz

    Chairman of the Nelson Mandela House Tenants Association. Baz is the only witness to one of the funniest moments in Fools history - Rodney finally telling Trigger his name is not Dave. "What is it, a nickname?"

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    47. Joyce

    A Nags Head barmaid / style icon. As brassy as a buckle, Joyce looked a bit like a young Pat Butcher with a hangover. Other barmaids of note have included Karen, Julie, Vicky, Maureen and of course, Nerys...

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    46. Nervous Nerys

    The stunning barmaid who briefly stole Rodney's heart. Clearly out of his league, Rodney's big date with Nerys ended in disaster largely due to Mickey Pearce being a buffoon, but also due to Rodney being a plonker.

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    45. Father O'Keith

    The Peckham holy man could be seen in the episode where Biffo wanted Rodney dead for stealing his trumpet. (Biffo hasn’t made the 50, poor Biffo, don’t hit us Biffo.) For a while O'Keith almost believed that Del Boy was a holy prophet. Almost.

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    44. Pamela Parry

    Cassandra's slightly posh mother. Pam is a bit of snob and doesn't approve of her husband's drinking habits. Good fact here, Cassandra's mother is actually the real life mum of a certain Mr Benedict Cumberbatch.

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    43. Debbie

    The girl from the newsagents who Rodney becomes besotted with after going into her shop for a “dirty mag”. The poor wally’s feelings become a tad confused when it is suggested that Debs might actually be Rodney's niece. "Put her down Rodney!"

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    42. Yvonne

    One of Del's many, many, many old flames. Like Raquel, Yvonne is a former stripper. In latter days Yvonne can be found making a living as an "exotic dancer, with snake." Pret-a-manger!

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    41. Dirty Barry

    With a name that sounds like it belongs in the Viz Profanisaurus, Dirty Barry ran Peckham's sex shop. Wikipedia claims the actor behind Barry went on to be in Ridley Scott's Prometheus. He didn't. It was a different, much less popular Prometheus.

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    40. Mr Chin

    Proprietor of Peckham's Golden Lotus Chinese restaurant, poor old Mr Chin shows too much trust in The Trotters. He has his kitchen painted luminous yellow with some paint stolen by Trigger / Monkey Harris.

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    39. Auntie Rose

    An old lady living in Clacton, who the Trotters wrongly assume to be a long lost relative. "Who are you?" she eventually asks them, after they've stayed an age, the real Auntie Rose having moved home years ago.

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    38. CID Sandra

    The young police officer who briefly dated Rodney much to Grandad's despair. "One wrong word from that plonker Rodney an Del could end up doing five years."

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    37. Lady Victoria Marsham Hales

    A member of the Royal Family who took a shine to Rodders. Del Boy got dizzy with ideas on how this Covington House heiress could help turn The Trotters into millionaires. Appeared in John Sullivan’s least favourite episode.

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    36. Anna

    A pregnant teenage German au pair, who almost sold her baby boy to Boycie despite it being a girl. Actress Erika Hoffman went on to play Lesley in Brush Strokes. Wasn't even a real German.

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    35. Arnie

    A retired jewellery dealer, Arnold was such a great character, it would have been brilliant to see him in more than one episode. The man's heart was a dodgy as his gold chains. A proper cushty git.

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    34. Eugene McCarthy

    A vicious Peckham gangster who had a habit of nailing people to doors, but still, you know, he really loved his mum. Rumour had it that the SAS paid Eugene protection money. "Don't disappoint me Del."

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    33. Pauline Harris

    Del's ex-fiancé, perhaps some kind of relative to Monkey Harris, we're not 100% sure. After her husband Bobby dies, Rodney suspects that she killed him, and fears Del is going to be next on her hit list.

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    32. Don Vincenzo Occhetti

    The other character played by David Jason. A mafia boss / head of the Occhetti Crime Family. "That man, he looka nothing like me," said Vin. "He's taller, skinny." Er, that'll be Rodders mate.

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    31. Mr Ram

    Owner of a chain of south London curry houses, Mr Ram is a cheeky scam artist who plots with Del's Indian chum Vimmal Malik. Ram knows people who know karate. Del meanwhile knows “origami”.

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    30. Danny Driscoll

    A petrifying local gangster, originally written for Anthony Hopkins to play. Story has it that huge Fools fan Hopkins desperately wanted the role, but was too busy filming Silence of The Lambs to be able to take it.

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    29. Tony Driscoll

    The smaller of The Driscoll brothers, Tony provides the real comedy in the Peckham bad boys partnership. Played by Christopher Ryan, who you'll recognise as also being Mike from The Young Ones.

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    28. June Snell

    Another of Del's ex-girlfriends. Her relationship with Del broke down when she had an affair with his best mate Albie Littlewood. Coincidently Del had been sleeping with Albie's girlfriend Deirdre around the same time. Big hair.

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    27. Jumbo Mills

    Del's old business partner and co-founder of the failed Eels on Wheels seafood empire. He's also a gloriously bald man in a comedy wig. Jumbo tried to lure the Trotters out of Peckham to a new life in Australia. Failed naturally.

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    26. Elsie Partridge

    Uncle Albert's girlfriend. Partridge can talk to the dead, a power that leads Del Boy to thinking he might have AIDS. Eventually she lures Albert out of Peckham to a new life by the coast.

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    25. The Great Raymondo

    The gay magician who Raquel reluctantly worked for. Del punched him in Margate. Another Great Raymondo would one day appear in The Simpsons, though we're not sure if that was out of tribute or coincidence.

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    24. Lennox “The Shadow” Gilbey

    A desperate criminal who took The Trotters hostage at gunpoint in Series Five. "I have to do this, I haven't had a job in six years!" Nor has Rodney. "I haven't got a future." Nor has Rodney.

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    23. Reg Trotter

    Grandad's son, Del's dad, Rodney's step-father. Reg is mentioned often but appears in just one episode, "Thicker Than Water." Played by Peter Woodthorpe, AKA Gollum in the 1978 Lord of The Rings movie.

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    22. Corrine

    Denzil's scary wife. Actress Eva Mottley tragically died of a drug overdose in 1985, but John Sullivan kept the character alive off camera, with Denzil often talking about her wicked ways.

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    21. Tony Angelino

    A singing dustman who could croon any tune just as long as it didn't have an R in it. "Cwying over you! Crwying over you!" Sing it Tony! Sing it you orange faced lord of the bins!

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    20. Gary

    Gary was an illegal immigrant found in Denzil's lorry. All Gary could say was Gary which was why Gary was so funny. Gary! Sometimes Gary could make us laugh before he'd even said Gary. It was all in the anticipation of the Gary.

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    19. Damien

    Del's son may have been a bit of a one trick pony, but what a great trick... freaking out Rodders. We liked him when he was a demon baby from hell, we liked him again when he was older, bullying his plonker face uncle.

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    18. Jevon

    Rodney's other mate, aside from the infamous Mickey Pearce. It is fair to say that Jevon was a bit of a ladies man. Actor Steven Woodcock would later become "Clyde" in Eastenders. We think he had sex with Michelle and / or Mark Fowler.

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    17. Alan Parry

    Cassandra's dad. Alan was a working class kid, who lived the Trotter dream and got rich through hard graft / a bit of luck. However all he really wanted to do in life was get drunk and eat eels – weirdly jealous of Del.

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    16. Joan Trotter

    Never seen, aside from in the spin-off Rock & Chips, Joan was Del and Rodney's dear dead mother. A saint, who seemed to say so very, very much in her last words on her death bed.

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    15. Sid

    A cafe owner so engrained with filth that he was arrested for poisoning his customers on at very least three occasions. Somehow he ended up running the Nag's Head after Mike went to jail. Such a dirty man.

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    14. DCI Roy Slater

    The perfect villain, and Del Boy's nemesis. He'd slept with Del's girl Raquel, he'd nicked Del countless times, hell, he even managed to be more bent than a Trotter despite being a copper.

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    13. Mike

    A big, loveable, gullible fool, and hence Del Boy's favourite customer. Whatever hooky merch there was to sell, the Nags Head landlord seemed to get first dabs. His last name? Fisher. But you knew that...

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    12. Monkey Harris

    Monkey's magic was all down to the fact that we never actually saw him. Perhaps one of the greatest unseen TV characters ever, alongside Mrs Norm (Cheers), Mrs Columbo (Columbo) and Maris Crane (Frasier).

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    11. Cassandra

    Rodney's better half oozed John Sullivan's dry wit. Posher, smarter, more sensible than Rodney could ever be, she's as solid during the more poignant moments as she is with the comedy put downs.

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    10. Denzil

    Poor, poor, Denzil. People only ever wanted him for his lorry. Forever in crisis, always getting ripped off, Denzil felt so much pain. He never wanted to get involved in any of Del's scams, always did, "cos Del's a mate."

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    9. Raquel

    Del changed her name from Rachel to Raquel, but never from Turner to Trotter. Del's ex stripper, long term girlfriend, never became his wife and was forever left as his "significant other". Hard as nails, funny as hell.

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    8. Marlene

    The long suffering Mrs Boycie. Formerly known as "The Peckham Bicycle", most of Sullivan's male characters had a ride, before Boycie bagged her for good. Amazingly she was only ever spoken of, yet never actually seen until the fourth series.

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    7. Mickey Pearce

    Rodney's dodgy mate who looked a bit (no a lot) like a human Roland Rat. Usually up to some scam, never far from being arrested, forever in a pork pie hat. As slippery as an eel in custard.

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    6. Boycie

    A second hand car dealer who would happily sell his own grandmother if it meant getting one over on a Trotter, or making a few quid. Cigars, cognac, moustache, shiny suits, big dog, Rolls Royce - need we say more?

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    5. Rodders

    A loser. A plonker. A right Rodney with a GCE and a criminal record. Nicholas Lyndhurst's cosmic character changed more than most over the years, slowly growing more bitter and broken with every fresh failure. Triffic. Just triffic.

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    4. Trigger

    Peckham's award winning road sweep and perhaps the most stupid man ever to be on TV. What was going on with Trig? In hindsight he must have been ill. "Alright, Dave?" Brilliant.

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    3. Grandad

    A dirty, mean, moany old geezer and arguably Sullivan's most complex character. Like a Saawf Landaan Larry David there was so much wonderful whingeing going on. "Aw, Del." Given half a chance he could be a truly crafty bugger too.

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    2. Del Boy

    Derek, oh Derek - a dreamer who once fell through a bar in a manner so fantastic that people still talk about it decades later. Such a icon of our nation, he appeared at the Olympics closing ceremony, dressed as Batman. The world shrugged, London laughed.

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    1. Uncle Albert

    With his upside down head and tall tales of sunken sea boats, Albert never failed to entertain. Buster's character may have begun life as a second rate Grandad, shoehorned in after Lennard Pearce's death, but he grew into this big salty Santa, an institution, the most beautiful fool.