Sport

This topless man absolutely kicking off at Ascot is the most British 45 seconds in history

Posted by
Alex Finnis
Published

If someone asked you to conjure up an image of Britain in your mind; one picture that sums up the essence of the country, what would you come up with? A steaming hot, perfectly-brewed cup of tea? A freshly-baked scone layered with cream and jam? A beefeater standing tall and proud outside Buckingham Palace.

Wrong. All of those are wrong. The actual perfect image of Britain – the only way to paint an accurate picture of this country to someone – would be to show them this video. This 45 seconds of footage. This 45 seconds-worth of a topless man at Royal Ascot racecourse, trying to have a fight with everybody. This video is Britain.

That’s the same Royal Ascot where the Queen is in attendance. The same Royal Ascot at which the women are made to wear outlandish, thousand-pound hats. Nothing shows the disparity between British stereotypes and Britain in reality better than this video.

If you asked an American to describe this country, it would be that land of tea, scones and beefeaters. It would be Prince William and Harry Potter. In reality, Britain is this shirtless man tearing through a group of suited-up punters trying to lamp a stranger.

Why’s he shirtless, you might be asking. Because in Britain, if you want to have a proper fight, you have to take your shirt off. It’s a fact. It’s just what we do.

Here’s a GIF, because why not.

The video was taken and uploaded to Twitter by Dan Ingram with the caption: “ROYAL ASCOT ….. The queen is here”, and has so far been retweeted more than 3,500 times.

It has since been set to various theme tunes, making it even better, as if that were possible.

Oh, and then it got EVEN BETTER, because it turns out there’s more footage of the incident, after the topless man has seemingly calmed down, but everyone else hasn’t. There are scuffles breaking out all over the shop and one woman even gets pushed over into some drinks. It’s all going off, basically.

Another Twitter user, @kidd_kong78, had the perfect caption for the video: “Brexit negotiations”.

So yeah, next time anyone starts going on about ‘British values’ or starts going on about how quaint we all are, just show them this video.