If there’s one thing we know about Piers Morgan, it’s that he doesn’t like being ignored.
Ridiculed? Fine. Shouted at? Yeah, no biggie. But ignore him at your peril.
I know this. You know this. And now even Jeremy Corbyn knows it.
Corbyn’s smarter than us, too, which is why he found a foolproof workaround which made it simple for him to be in the vicinity of the Good Morning Britain host without having to speak to him.
Before you say anything, we’re well aware that we wouldn’t know about this if it wasn’t for Morgan telling us in his Mail on Sunday column, so in a sense we’ve already fallen into his trap.
But this is about Corbyn, not Morgan, so we’ll plough ahead.
Arsenal fan Morgan was sharing a table with Gunners full-back Héctor Bellerín at the GQ Men of the Year awards, and explained what happened when he tried to insert himself into a conversation between Bellerín and Corbyn, who follows the same football club as Morgan but is unlikely to have much else in common with him.
‘Later, fellow Arsenal fan Jeremy Corbyn came over to speak to him,’ Morgan wrote.
‘When I tried to interrupt, the Labour leader – whose wife is Mexican – promptly switched to fluent Spanish to shut me out of the conversation.’
Conveniently for the rest of the column, Morgan would later relay what the Labour leader told him when asked to translate.
Of course, as far as we’re aware, this is a thing that definitely happened and not a set-up for Morgan to make a cheap joke at Corbyn’s expense while simultaneously edging closer to his word count.
‘Corbyn smirked. ‘I told him to please send Arsène Wenger my very best and assure him he continues to have my full support, even if he’s lost yours, Piers. In fact, particularly because he’s lost yours…’,’ Morgan’s retelling continues.
‘‘He’s lost mine because we keep losing,’ I retorted. ‘You and Wenger are the only losers in football and politics to keep their job… no wonder you love him.’’
In the two games after that conversation, Bellerín has played his part as Arsenal picked up back-to-back clean sheets in the Premier League against Bournemouth and Chelsea.
Corbyn’s influence clearly knows no bounds, and he can feel within his rights to return to the scene of the crime.
Fue un placer conocerte. Es mejor que no le digamos de lo que estábamos hablando, no lo entendería. Muy buen juego en el partido el domingo.— Jeremy Corbyn (@jeremycorbyn) September 19, 2017
(For those of you not fluent in Spanish, that reads: “It was nice meeting you. It’s best if we do not tell him what we were talking about, he would not understand. Very good game in the match on Sunday.”)
(Images: Rex Features)