It’s not often that a Vanarama National League game would lead to a viral tweet, but that’s what happened on Saturday during a televised game between Ebbsfleet United and Leyton Orient, when a Maidstone fan named Joe spotted something deeply wrong on the pitch (well, aside from Orient’s utterly abysmal defending):
If I had the number 5 shirt at the club and he joined I’d insist on him taking it. Heads should be rolling for this.— Joe (@RedAndWhite11) November 11, 2017
A very fair point, with this reply no less fair:
The man himself was amused:
While the club tried to talk their way out of this unacceptable state of affairs:
He later explained that he had been keen for the number 5 shirt, currently held by centre back Dave Winfield, saying: “I told my gaffer [Daryl McMahon] the same thing, but I don’t think he believed me until over this weekend, when it has just blown up all over social media. Maybe now he’ll take it a bit more seriously and change the numbers next season.”
And, really, this change of number was well overdue, according to this story:
Charlton played Halifax in the FA Cup a few years back (televised on ITV) and at 4-0, before a Charlton corner, Peter Drury remarked “Mambo no longer coming forward for number 5” true story— Nathan Hildred (@hills90) November 12, 2017
But, in an excellent twist of affairs, some good is going to come out of this whole sorry situation, with the club announcing that they have made a special one-off ‘Mambo No.5’ shirt, which will be sold on ebay in aid of Prostate Cancer UK.
The club writes underneath:
“With the No.5 shirt registered this season to our captain Dave Winfield, we’re not going to literally take the shirt off our skipper’s back so we’ve come up with the next-best solution to hopefully go some way to satisfy social media’s demands and do something positive at the same time.
And that’s where this auction comes in… an XL-sized Ebbsfleet United replica home shirt produced by Macron but with a difference: the only one to sport the Mambo No.5 legend and be officially endorsed by the club in the form of a signed photo of Yado Mambo and the shirt, together with a certificate of authenticity from the club. Our first bid came in at £350 so that’s where we’re starting the bidding.”
Admit it, you really want it don’t you? Imagine striding down the high street in a brand-new Ebbsfleet shirt, Mambo no.5 on your back, like a total hero.
Plus, before long, you’ll have a little bit of Monica in your life, a little bit of Erica by your side, a little bit of Rita (which is all you need), a little bit of Tina (is what you’ll see), a little bit of Sandra in the sun, a little bit of Mary all night long and a little bit of Jessica (here I am).
Go on, get bidding - it’s up for a week and it’s all for charity.
And it the meantime, hit play on this bad boy: