Music

A woman has been jailed for playing Ed Sheeran on repeat

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Gary Ogden
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You know when you like a song a lot, so you play it all the time? Yeah, well you know when you eventually start to hate that song because you’ve played it too much? Just be thankful that you didn’t go to prison for listening to it on repeat. 

Really, you probably only annoyed yourself, didn’t you? Maybe if you were blasting it through your speakers you might have irked your flatmates or neighbours a bit, but you didn’t take the piss. Or maybe you did, like a young lady from Willenhall, who played Ed Sheeran – ‘Shape Of You’ again and again and again until she drove her neighborhood crazy.

She had already had a court order filed by her landlords preventing her from creating, according to the judge, a “wholly unacceptable level of disturbance”. However, she continually broke the order and was arrested and served a six-week sentence back in December.

After she was released, she obviously went straight back to her flat and blasted out some top-volume Ed on repeat for half an hour straight, so she ended up back in court.

Now she’s going back to jail for eight weeks. The judge said: “You must learn that you should behave as a reasonable and responsible adult and not make life for your neighbours the misery that you have.”

Really though, it’s not her fault if people can’t recognise a top-tier banger when they hear one.

Either way, presumably she’s pissing off her cellmates by playing another song on repeat, instead.

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Gary Ogden

Shortlist writer and "the least woke person in the office", Gary Ogden, likes horror movies, Cheestrings, tapping his leg under the desk, "having a drink", PDAs, not having eczema anymore, hiding from responsibility, screaming into the mirror whenever he is alone, and assorted other things. Mainly the eczema thing though. @garyblogden

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