First impressions are everything. Just ask all those people who avoided you when you got that weird haircut back in the mid-90s.
So you'd assume that movie marketers would put their all into the making of the poster. Yet, time and time again, we're subjected to the terrifying curse of Photoshop and taglines that have zero respect for logic, sense or our poor brains.
The Day of the Dolphin
"Unwittingly, he trained a dolphin to kill the President of the United States."
"When you can live forever, what can you live for?"
"Great things come in bears."
I Was A Teenage Werewolf
"The most amazing motion picture of our time!"
The Tooth Fairy
"You can't handle the tooth."
"The only thing more terrifying than the last 12 minutes of this film are the final 92"
Charlie St. Cloud
"Life is for living."
"Science created him. Now Chuck Norris must destroy him."
"The impossible true story"
"Take the stairs, take the stairs, for God's sake, take the stairs!!"
"The truth is not what you know. It's what you believe."
"This summer, terror won't be taking a vacation"
From Paris With Love
"Two Agents. One City. No Merci."
Cool As Ice
"When a girl has a heart of stone, there's only one way to melt it. Just add ice."
"Every year young people disappear."
"Remember the future."
Nanny McPhee and the Big Bang
"Who's your nanny?"
"His father, her mother, his mother and her father all in one day."
The Flesh Eaters
"The only people who will not be STERILIZED with FEAR are those among you who are already dead."
Marley & Me
"This Christmas, heel the love."
No Strings Attached
"Can sex friends stay best friends?"
Jaws: The Revenge
"This time it's personal."
"By Sword. By Pick. By Axe. Bye Bye."
The Green Hornet
"Breaking the law to protect it."
Crank: High Voltage
"He was dead...but he got better."
The Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3
"He puts the teeth in terror."
"Talking just causes witnesses."
"It happened to someone who knows someone you know...You're next."
Sisterhood Of the Traveling Pants
"Laugh. Cry. Share the pants."
"Twelve is the new eleven."
Star Trek V
"Why are they putting seatbelts in theaters this summer?"
"Not to be confused with King Kong."
Die Hard 2
"They axed for it."
Life Is Hot In Cracktown
"Be cool. Life is cool. You're so cool in cracktown."
Jack Frost 2
"He's icin' and slicin'."
"The system gives him a raw deal. Nobody gives him a raw deal."
'"It takes all kinds of critters to make Farmer Vincent fritters."'
The Matrix Revolutions
"Everything that has a beginning has an end."
"Nobody does it better...thirteen times."
Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade
"The man with the hat is back. And this time he's bringing his dad."
"It's not called gym-nice-tics."
Running With Scissors
"Don't disturb them. They already are"
"Holmes for the holiday."
Home on the Range
"Bust A Moo."
"A girl. A machine gun. A revenge."
"Death is just around the corner."
"Ex-cop. Ex-CIA. Ex-plosive."
"What happens when the numbers run out?"