Wrestler come man-giant of the silver screen, the one bona fide true action hero of our time.
A man who went from tussling around in his speedos and raising his eyebrow to being one of the biggest (in every single way) stars of cinema. A man whose range allows him to save puppies and pose for sensitive pool pictures and fight earthquakes at the drop of a hat. Conclusive proof that in life, absolutely anything is possible.
An all-round good guy, an absolute inspiration to all of us, as proved by these five images.
Look, learn and bask in his majestic greatness.
The Rock with his massive Dad
Lots of things that are great about this. Firstly, The Rock’s Dad is absolutely massive and dressed in a manner that The Rock would later adopt during his reign in the ring (Fig. A). It’s like a prophecy of everything yet to come.
Secondly, that pink suit. He’s standing proud, he’s with his hench Dad and he’s head-to-toe in pink velvet. He was not forced to wear that suit. Nobody would ever dress their child like that, especially not this Dad - look at him. The Child Rock woke up one morning and decided to dress like a renassiance sweet factory owner and nobody stopped him.
This picture says 'Be You'. Don’t be afraid to go with what feels right, even if other people laugh at you.
It’s fine, you’re wearing pink and you feel good and there’s a chance that one day you’ll grow up to be 118kg of solid meaty muscle with teeth that glisten like the ivory on a vintage Steinway. And if you don’t, well, it doesn’t matter because your Dad is absolutely massive.
The Rock hugging a rock
It doesn’t get any better than this.
Philosophy students should be forced to study this picture and examine every last connotation. It’s so meta that if you stare at it for too long your eyeballs would probably have a cardiac arrest. But all in all it’s about loving yourself. He’s hugging a rock. It couldn’t be clearer. Love yourself. Love. Yourself.
The Rock in a log flume
Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson has it all. Great teeth, huge gains and a career as one of the highest earning actors in Hollywood - yet despite all that he still gets happy on a log flume. So happy that his muscles are forcing their way out of his skin to explode with joy. Muscles that are so big that they’ve turned his friend at the back into a cardboard cut-out of Will Ferrell gurning. And look at those teeth. Wow.
This picture tells you that, no matter how much you have, no matter what you do, the simple things in life will always be the best. Simple things like being super-hench and covered in stagnant, vomit enthused water at Splash Mountain. Never forget where you came from.
The Rock caressing a bumbag
The only people that ever wear bumbags are: your Mum, substitute teachers and people pretending that they love the 90s. The only people that wear bumbags are The Rock.
People probably laughed at him: ‘You can’t wear a roll neck tucked into Dad jeans, teamed with a statement chain and a bumbag. Are you insane?’.
'NO!' He probably bellowed, 'I’m The Rock and IT DOESN’T MATTER.' Because really, it doesn’t. Nothing matters, as long as you feel good. And The Rock feels good.
But, by far the most important part of this picture? The subtle placement of what looks like toilet roll beneath his left (peoples) elbow, likely in an effort to combat chalky concrete marks getting on his roll neck. This is a lesson in the value of perfection and pride. Take pride in everything you do and one day, you could be fighting earthquakes on the silver screen.
The Rock holding a lobster and being funny
Have you ever seen a happier man? Imagine dating this guy. He invites you over for dinner, he's doing lobster, he's rocking his vest/apron combo and he's playing it up. He's probably doing funny voices, maybe he's singing a medley of songs from The Little Mermaid, whatever he's doing it's probably awesome. And then, a deep, dramatic scream of pain. 'THE LOBSTER IS ON ME! IT'S CLAMPED IT'S DEVIL CLAWS ON MY FINGER... HELP... I'm just kidding babe, choose any DVD you want and stick it on. Tonight's about you, can you smell what The Rock is cooking?'
The lesson? Nothing's a chore, even cooking, it's just an opportunity to share happiness.
Be the change that you want to see in the world people. Be The Rock.
Bonus: The Rock rock-bombing two ladies
Yes. Yes. Yes.