A new survey of over 2,000 people conducted by video social network eva, found that men with longer facial hair are more likely to fight, cheat, steal and generally engage in antisocial behaviour (leaving trimmings in the sink?).
An incredible 65 per cent of heterosexual women said they didn’t think beards were a good look and half said they’d never even consider getting romantically involved with a man with a beard.
The survey also found that 47 per cent of bearded men admitted to cheating on their partners, compared to just 20 per cent of clean-shaven men. The survey didn't say whether this was simply because bearded men were more honest but we'll have to assume they're not.
It’s a fact that smooth cheeked men have known (and felt) for some time: having a beard is a sure sign of a dangerous criminal and makes you less attractive to women. A fact that we can obviously validate now because well, the survey says...
In the light of all this crushing evidence, maybe it’s time to bid farewell to the beard.
Sorry, Mr. Corbyn/Jesus/Captain Bird’s Eye but you can't argue with a survey.