The royale, the monkey tail, the Fu Manchu; a simple ‘beard’ just doesn’t cut it these days. But as anyone who has attempted advanced facial topiary will tell you (from beneath a surgical dressing, probably) – there is a panoply of things that can go wrong.
Happily, then, to soothe your follicular concerns, Gillette has invented a new 3-in-1 shaving accoutrement called the Fusion ProGlide Styler (£20). A battery-powered beard trimmer combined with a razor and a sharp ‘edging’ blade, it aims to provide the kind of ‘Photoshopped’ precision practised by the likes of David Beckham and Andre 3000.
How? With a number of a hi-tech innovations including a low-resistance coating on the blades that affords a clean cut without tugging at roots, and a Lubrastrip infused with mineral oils to ensure the blade skates over your face. Gillette has even gone to the trouble of inventing a special ‘Clear’ shaving gel (£4 for 175ml). It is non-foaming, and thus won’t obscure your view. Essentially, if you still can’t get something vaguely symmetrical, you may well need glasses.