Sick of wearing regular ugly Christmas jumpers? Want to go more niche and weird with your festive knitwear? We hear you, so we’ve rounded up the most bat shit crazy options that’ll bring tears of pain to Santa’s eyes and utter confusion to your family, featuring Trump, Deadpool and Slayer holiday sweaters.
He’s already on his way to making America great again, but why stop there? Make Christmas great again, Halloween, Easter, St Patrick’s Day. Didn’t know the USA or holidays needed fixing? Neither did we.
I’d never thought I’d want to put a restraining order against Santa, but if he keeps touching himself outside my bedroom window, what choice do I have?
With all the excessive Greggs festive bakes and vomiting Baileys all December, you sometimes lose sight that it’s the big lad’s birthday. Sorry, Jesus, I’m busy on the 25th, can’t make it to Wetherspoons.
Remind yourselves of the tough, malnourished days of university where meals consisted of supermarket own brand beans and more beans with this Tesco Value Christmas jumper.
The biggest meme of the year has now become the biggest Christmas jumper of the season. When will this madness end? This dead gorilla got 11,000 votes in the US election. 2016, you crazy.
Game of Thrones really needs to do a Christmas special, because the world needs to see Jon Snow singing East 17’s Stay Another Day in his Northern twang.
Who wants turkey when you can have Mexican food on Christmas Day? We’d rather not have this red guy coming down our chimney though, my nana would be livid at his language.
Reign in blood? Reign in snow. Even metal heads love Christmas, y’know. They do it just the same as you. They all sit at a table, pull a cracker, wear the paper hats, sacrifice a goat to the one true lord, Satan. Seriously, it’s 2016, you all need to be more accepting.
Nothing says Merry Christmas more than parallel dimensions and flesh eating monsters. Be careful with the beige colour though, because you just know that’s a gravy stain hazard waiting to happen.
What is the true meaning of Christmas? For some it’s reuniting with family and appreciating what you have, for others it’s getting shit faced and playing video games. If yours is the latter, this Fallout jumper is for you.
It makes you feel quite uneasy, doesn’t it? If you’d like to make the Christmas dinner table even more awkward, show up in this bad boy.
Captain America can’t always be out kicking Nazis heads in, sometimes he needs to chill out just like the rest of us. But having a Christmas jumper with your own insignia, talk about being narcissistic. Give it a rest, cap.