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A woman has been tweeting all the messed up things her boyfriend says in his sleep

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Talking in your sleep is like talking on the Tube: it’s weird and nobody wants to hear it.

Well that is unless you're a man from Kansas affectionately known as Sir Lord Dick Pat, whose girlfriend has been keeping a note of all your gibberish patter in deepest slumber and now put it on Twitter for the world to see.

Posting under the handle @sleep_sayings, the sleep chatter ranges from the cute ('No octopus you can’t do that'), the mundane ('I’ll take vanilla please'), to the downright terrifying (‘Oh god. OH GOD. We've gotta get the chainsaw first.'). But at least we've got a good insight into the dream world of a man we'll probably never meet.

Take a look at the best so far below:

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