You know that black soot that suddenly appears in your nose when you first move to London, despite you definitely not walking past a coal mine?
Well, you’re in the big smoke now and that should have been your first clue as to the filth you were about to embrace.
Not experienced it? You’re probably a London native, which means you were born with bronchi made of steel.
Your stomach however, is not immune to the fact that there are 358 restaurants in the capital with a zero star hygiene rating.
And it’s not something that’s reserved for last ditch kebab options at 4am. ITV has revealed that Westminster has one of the highest numbers of zero rated restaurants in a borough, with 25 subpar servers. Perhaps it’s a dirty attack on politicians, but we doubt it and it’s gross.
Camden doesn’t fair well either if you don’t want to spend tomorrow on the toilet whereas your guts are totally safe in Havering.
Starting to doubt your local takeaway? Check their rating at the FSA’s website and choose where next to chow down carefully.
Here's the full list of dirty servers:
Barking and Dagenham

1 takeaway given a zero star rating

0 restaurants given a zero star rating
Barnet

4 takeaways given a zero star rating

8 restaurants given a zero star rating
Bexley

1 takeaway given a zero star rating

2 restaurants given a zero star rating
Brent

11 takeaways given a zero star rating

11 restaurants given a zero star rating
Bromley

0 takeaways given a zero star rating

3 restaurants given a zero star rating
Camden

7 takeaways given zero stars

22 restaurants given zero stars

1 pub given zero stars
City

2 takeaways given zero stars

4 restaurants given zero stars
Croydon

15 takeaways given zero stars

9 restaurants given zero stars
Ealing

9 takeaways given zero stars

19 restaurants given zero stars
Enfield

10 takeaways given zero stars

9 restaurants given zero stars
Greenwich

4 takeaways given zero stars

0 restaurants given zero stars
Hackney

3 takeaways given zero stars

3 restaurants given zero stars
Hammersmith and Fulham

1 takeaway given zero stars

4 restaurants rated zero stars
Haringey

3 takeaways given zero stars

3 restaurants given zero stars
Harrow

5 takeaways given zero stars

12 restaurants given zero stars

1 pub given zero stars
Havering

0 takeaways given zero stars

0 restaurants given zero stars

0 pubs given zero stars
Hillington

2 takeaways given zero stars

4 restaurants given zero stars

1 pub given zero stars
Hounslow

2 takeaways given zero stars

2 restaurants given zero stars
Kensington and Chelsea

0 takeaways given zero stars

2 restaurants given zero stars
Kingston

3 takeaways given zero stars

1 restaurant given zero stars
Islington

7 takeaways given zero stars

8 restaurants given zero stars

2 pubs given zero stars
Lambeth

2 takeaways given zero stars

1 restaurant given zero stars
Lewisham

8 takeaways given zero stars

5 restaurants given zero stars
Merton

3 takeaways given zero stars

3 restaurants given zero stars

1 pub given zero stars
Newham

12 takeaways given zero stars

10 restaurants given zero stars

1 pub given zero stars
Redbridge

1 takeaways given zero stars

4 restaurants given zero stars
Richmond

0 takeaways given zero stars

3 restaurants given zero stars

1 pub given zero stars
Southwark

5 takeaways given zero stars

4 restaurants given zero stars
Sutton

4 takeaways awarded zero stars

3 restaurants awarded zero stars
Tower Hamlets

0 takeaways awarded zero stars

17 restaurants awarded zero stars
Waltham Forest

4 takeaways given a zero star score

3 restaurants given a zero star score

1 pub awarded zero stars
Wandsworth

9 takeaways scored only zero

6 restaurants scored zero
Westminster

0 takeaways scored zero

22 restaurants scored zero

3 pubs scored zero stars