Jump to Main ContentJump to Primary Navigation
Top

Ridiculous food combinations that are actually really tasty

ice.png

Food can be boring, right? Gets a bit stale after a while. Oooh, another burger. Great, same old ham and cheese sandwich. Wow, thanks, a plate of spag bol, you’re the best.

So now and again, it’s nice to mix things up a bit – switch around your ingredients, think outside the box. Sometimes, they work, sometimes they don’t (like Marmite mixed into tinned mackerel – trust me), but isn’t half the thrill in the finding out? 

Whether it is or isn’t, here’s a good selection of at least ten combinations that I’ve found to be mighty worth trying:

Coffee with sriracha sauce

This should not work. Coffee should not really be combined with anything other than sugar and milk. OK, fine, I add honey to it sometimes, and if I’m feeling like a Greedy Gus, then I might pop in a bit of that naughty hazelnut syrup or something. But only on birthdays and funerals.

So adding sriracha sauce to your nice morning coffee seems a tad rogue. But believe in me, and yourself, and give it a go. If you need properly perking up, then this is the combination for you – your arse will be through the roof in no time.

Chips and McFlurry

McDonald’s chips are peng, McDonald’s McFlurrys are peng. Add them both together, and what do you get? Peng. This’ll pretty much work with any chip and/or any ice cream, but there’s something about ordering just those two items, immediately pouring your chips into the McFlurry and eating it all without breaking eye contact with the cashier. If you can mix it all together in a shoe, then even better.

Peanut butter and Philadelphia on toast

Both of these things are good on toast – I think peanut butter pips it, to be honest, but they’re both a laugh. Add them together, and you’re looking straight down the throat of ultimate, creamy pleasure. 

Warning: this is extremely annoying to spread, but persevere and you’ll need to have a bottom-half shower straight afterwards.

An instant noodle sandwich

Two pieces of white bread, loads of butter and then a whole packet of 60p instant noodles shoved in between. No nutritional value, loads of carbs, and a pretty hefty sprinkling of regret. Best eaten in front of the mirror, on the floor, naked.

Ready salted Pringles dipped in mayonnaise

e

You’re sort of supposed to have Pringles with dip, aren’t you? The best dip is sour cream and chive, obviously, but there are others out there to try – go wild. However, the best dip is hiding in your fridge – no, not blood, it’s mayonnaise. Dip some ready salted (and it has to be ready salted) Pringles in mayonnaise and Bob is now your uncle, and potentially, if she’s got the time, Fanny can provisionally be your aunt.

Related: A roast dinner with mayonnaise

s

Everyone loves a roast dinner, even if they’re just pretending – it’s something you have to say if you are British. And obviously, a roast dinner isn’t a roast dinner without heaps of gravy. What you didn’t realise is, that putting a load of mayonnaise in with the gravy will make the whole meal at the very least, three times better.

Yes, it curdles, and yes, it looks a bit like something you might find under the covers in a weird hostel in Swanage, but yo, that shit is the opposite of wack. Mayonnaise and gravy on roast potatoes = yes please. Mayonnaise and gravy on chicken = put it in me. Mayonnaise and gravy on Brussels sprouts = they are now nice. Mayonnaise and gravy in a pint glass = I shouldn’t have been drinking this in bed because I’ve spilled it – I hope they clean this properly before the next person visits this hostel.

Milk and Skittles

Pour yourself a nice pint of milk, then pour about half a packet of Skittles in it. Wait a bit, then drink it whilst watching Teletubbies. It’s top-stuff, tastes amazing and as a cool, hip extra feature: the milk goes a funny colour. Then when you’ve finished the milk, you’ve got a glass full of soggy sweets at the bottom to pour down your big, annoying, childish gob. 

Pasta, beef mince, gherkins and burger sauce

I made this at uni once, and as soon as I took one bite, I realised that it tasted exactly like a Big Mac. I begrudgingly allowed my housemates to try some, and they all agreed, so we put all of our genius creative minds together and came up with a snappy, easily marketable name: Big Mac Pasta. I made it numerous times throughout the term and each time a year fell off my lifespan!

Salt, pepper, and porcelain

s

Sometimes I like to grind a load of salt and pepper onto a clean plate and then just lick it.

Do not do this though, I think it is dangerous.

Pineapple and pizza

ONLY JOKING YOU FUCKING DANGER.

(Image: devoncafe)

Related

quizz.jpg

Can we guess your social class from your food tastes?

fulleng.png

Brexit is now going to ruin your Full English Breakfast

More

We asked burger experts to design the perfect patty for the apocalypse

May as well die happy - while eating a burg

by Chris Sayer
18 Aug 2017

You can get free chips delivered right to your desk today

It's easy, and anyone can do it

by Tom Victor
18 Aug 2017

The 50 best restaurants in the UK have been named

Prepare for some 10/10 food porn

by Tom Victor
17 Aug 2017

What your coffee order says about you

According to an actual barista

by Carl Anka
16 Aug 2017

Aldi’s £18 whisky has been crowned one of the best in the world

They're getting good at this booze thing

by Tom Victor
16 Aug 2017

All hail Nigel Slater, the Quiet King of Cookery

The dangerously sensual chef makes cooking seem like the most enjoyable thing in the world

by Josh Baines
15 Aug 2017

There's a very cynical reason behind why crisp packets are so noisy

God damn them

by Emily Reynolds
15 Aug 2017

Wetherspoon's have a new rule and you're *not* going to like it

What are we supposed to do now?

by Tom Victor
14 Aug 2017

This mobile bar will deliver gin to your house

A gin and tonic please, driver

by Gary Ogden
14 Aug 2017

Your Subway sandwich just got more expensive and people are very upset

This is not on

by Dave Fawbert
11 Aug 2017