Jump to Main ContentJump to Primary Navigation

Real Madrid To Open Holiday Resort


Those who despair at football’s relentless and slavish pursuit of filthy lucre look away now. Gone? Good. So what can we tell the rest of you? Well, Real Madrid, never a club to shy away from besmirching what little dignity the once beautiful game has left, has unveiled plans to build a resort island in the United Arab Emirates.

The scheme, which will comprise luxury hotels, a marina, an amusement park, a 10,000-seat stadium, plus assorted Real Madrid sports facilities and museum, will cost an eye-watering $1 billion (£630 million), but we assume club president Florentino Perez has done his sums and will be expected to make that back. With interest.

The plans were launched in glittering style by Perez, who was flanked by a stern-looking club manager Jose Mourinho (still smarting from his team’s draw with Villarreal no doubt), club legend Zinedine Zidane, and players Karim Benzema, Sergio Ramas and Iker Casillas.

The artificial island of Al Marjan is set to open in January 2015.

We imagine Bobby Moore is spinning in his grave.



The Football Periodic Table


Facebook For Extremely Rich People


Geek dad 'shops Ewoks into holiday snaps



Luis Suarez talks English football and the toughest PL defenders

He's a lover, not a biter

19 Oct 2016

Gary Lineker talks crisps, Rooney and "Sh*t on pitch"

Crisp don Gary Lineker reminisces about the time Diego Maradona nearly fell off a balcony

by Alex Christian
19 Oct 2016

Park Ji-sung now plays for De Montfort University's student side

And can't even prevent them from getting utterly drubbed

by Tristan Cross
14 Oct 2016

Watch San Marino players celebrate first WCQ away goal in 15 years

Ecstasy in Oslo

by Dave Fawbert
12 Oct 2016

The first-ever green card has been awarded in a football match

But how do you get one?

by Dave Fawbert
10 Oct 2016

Football's wonderkids that never made it

The prodigal youngsters that left us boy wondering

by Tristan Cross
05 Oct 2016

Celtic’s 13 year old wonderkid is already better than you'll ever be

Karamoko Dembele made his debut for the U20s last night

04 Oct 2016

The new FIFA president wants to ruin the World Cup

He might have just f*cked up massively

by David Cornish
04 Oct 2016

Sam Allardyce was foolish but he shouldn’t have been sacked

The England mess leaves more questions than answers

by Dave Fawbert
28 Sep 2016

England manager Sam Allardyce leaves after one game in charge

Farewell, Big Sam, we hardly knew ye

27 Sep 2016