If the ceaseless rampage of Hollywood studios pillaging each and every one of your most sacred, formative childhood films fills you with rage, best glance once more at the headline and move along. It's not going to get any easier.
Fresh from rocking (sorry) box offices worldwide with a $118 million (£77m) opening weekend launch of San Andreas, Dwayne Johnson is continuing his pursuit for populist perfection by opening talks with Fox to star in a remake of Big Trouble in Little China.
Word comes from Deadline that Johnson is currently in negotiations to take the role of Jack Burton, played masterfully by Kurt Russell in the 1986 action classic.
Directed by John Carpenter, the original film saw the salt-of-the-earth truck driver Burton stumble into a mystical battle in Chinatown, San Francisco. We would explain the plot in detail to you, but if you haven't seen it, we recommend you watch the original trailer below.
Now imagine that, but with the unlikely girth of Dwayne Johnson handling the combat and one-liners in appropriately nonchalant fashion.
We can't wait - but we'll have to, as no word has yet been given on a production schedule, writer or director. We'll bring you further details as soon as they arrive. In the meantime, watch our interview with Johnson to find out more about one of his next pop culture roles as DC villain Black Adam in the upcoming Shazam! adaptation.