Jump to Main ContentJump to Primary Navigation
Top

EDINBURGH FRINGE 2010 FUNNIEST JOKES

_48826074_timvine.jpg

Tim Vine has picked up the award for funniest joke at this year's Fringe. Here's the top 10...

1) Tim Vine "I've just been on a once-in-a-lifetime holiday. I'll tell you what, never again."

2) David Gibson "I'm currently dating a couple of anorexics. Two birds, one stone."

3) Emo Philips "I picked up a hitch hiker. You've got to when you hit them."

4) Jack Whitehall "I bought one of those anti-bullying wristbands when they first came out. I say 'bought', I actually stole it off a short, fat ginger kid."

5) Gary Delaney "As a kid I was made to walk the plank. We couldn't afford a dog."

6) John Bishop "Being an England supporter is like being the over-optimistic parents of the fat kid on sports day."

7) Bo Burnham "What do you call a kid with no arms and an eyepatch? Names."

8) Gary Delaney "Dave drowned. So at the funeral we got him a wreath in the shape of a lifebelt. Well, it's what he would have wanted."

9) Robert White "For Vanessa Feltz, life is like a box of chocolates: Empty."

10) Gareth Richards "Wooden spoons are great. You can either use them to prepare food. Or, if you can't be bothered with that, just write a number on one and walk into a pub…"

Comments

More

The 12 best alt Christmas songs

Festive songs that you're not already sick of hearing

09 Dec 2016

Songs that sound Christmassy but aren't about Christmas

Festive (but not explicitly festive) tunes that you can hammer all year

by Tristan Cross
09 Dec 2016

Bear's Den's Ultimate Playlist

Indie folk Londoners reveal the songs they love

09 Dec 2016

The Shortlist guide to the 50 greatest songs of 2016 part 2

Did your favourite banger from the year make the cut?

by Dave Fawbert
09 Dec 2016

The first trailer for Spider-Man Homecoming looks absolutely badass

Our Spidey senses are tingling

by Chris Sayer
09 Dec 2016

The Shortlist guide to the 50 greatest songs of 2016

Your no-nonsense guide to this year's essential tunes

by Dave Fawbert
08 Dec 2016

Genuinely good Secret Santa gifts under £20

Drop the box of chocolates and put some actual effort in

by Jamie Carson
08 Dec 2016

The Rock and Zac Efron star in the first trailer for Baywatch

Slow-mo running included (obviously)

by Joe Ellison
08 Dec 2016

The art of getting hurt: the weird world of the journeyman boxer

Matt Blake charts the path of a fighter paid to be second best

08 Dec 2016

Riz Ahmed: "I think change is coming, but it’s slow”

Formidably talented and unapologetically smart, Riz Ahmed is the kind of British movie star we can get behind

by Dan Masoliver
08 Dec 2016